Of Interest: user-friendly, communication, portable, free agents, limited time of use, donation.
Asset Summary: Documentation issued along the first batch of Sixteenth Wondertainment Donation units follows:
Note: Thirty units of the Donation wrapped in bright red paper with the previous print were issued through flash materialization during the 23rd Yearly Review Meeting between the British Prime Minister and the European Branch Secretary of the Manna Charitable Foundation (at the time Blanca Castillo).
PR Department of
Hello, Charitable. As usual, another project that did exceedingly poorly with the intended target groups. Fortunately for both of us, those very same surveys have made it abundantly clear that we should focus on producing more plastic space robots that can be used as untraceable walkie-talkies, so at least it wasn't a complete waste of our time.
The Doc was really sad when we heard about it failing so miserably, by the way… we really loved this idea. There is no justice.
Anyways, we'll send you our surplus as they keep popping out of their eggs. Give them a good life, okay? And keep up the good work!
PS: I hope you don't mind the interruption, Prime Minister. It's for a good cause!
Note: A single printing of the card above was delivered with the mentioned batch.
Doctor Wondertainment Enterprises has been one of the most generous Benefactors the Manna Charitable Foundation has ever had the pleasure to receive donations from. While the identity, lawful standing and metaphysical status of the Doctor Wondertainment Enterprises and their employee(s) remain an unknown quantity, most of their gifts to the Manna Charitable Foundation have been a tremendous help to its cause.
Maintenance and Operation:
- MAINTENANCE: No maintenance concerns noted.
- OPERATION: 1) Open 'battery slot'. 2) Introduce piece of edible food — preferably, unwrapped candy, as it seems to be the intended 'power source' — in 'battery slot'. 3) Establish a pattern of iterative thoughts related to the desired receipt or receipts of the communication until the Asset establishes said communication. 4) Reload 'batteries' as necessary.
ATTENTION: Communication can be established between any pair of units; however, batteries will run out faster if the receiving unit is not charged, and communication will happen if attempted from an uncharged unit.
WARNING: Repeated usage of the Asset invariably results in malfunction. A period of ten to thirteen hours of 'rest' between uses of ten to fifteen minutes, maximum, is advised.
Safety Concerns: Safe for all.
Security Restrictions: Since no interception is possible when using the Sixteenth Wondertainment Donation to communicate, it is safe to say that this item does not require special Security Restrictions, as long as it is not identified as a means of long-range communications to persons unrelated to the Manna Charitable Foundation. Free agents and Executive members of the Manna Charitable Foundation Work Groups should be given individual items of the Sixteenth Wondertainment Donation, as Programme requirements state.
ATTENTION: Since there is no fixed schedule on the delivery of new batches, the International Board has full authority on the free agents and/or executive members that receive the Sixteenth Wondertainment Donation. Remember: this is a prized, rare asset with a noticeable impact in our global activities. If you find one, report immediately to an Executive member.