baubius author page

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rating: +46+x

Item number: SCP-BAUB

Object Class: Apollyon

Special Containment Procedures: u cant

Description: SCP-BAUB is a 16 y.o. boy who is white, has black hair, has bangs, has a completely different description irl, and has kawaii neko ears and tail. He he an expert realty bender and can do sick kick flips with his skatboard. All the boys and girls love him and give him free food the end

if u downvote this i hate u >:(


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page revision: 2, last edited: 31 Dec 2018, 12:00 (1 second ago)
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baubius author page — — — — — — — -

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lol is this a cool enough author page for u?

heyo guys its me [[user Sir Baubius]], the only true god, here. this is my author page. wowee. isnt it just soo meta and cool and witty lolol.

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[http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-2983 SCP-2983] - Stars, We Are

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They screamed, yet they weren't fully willing to scream. They saw an infinity of horrors beyond their current state of comprehension, yet their brain could still fathom the exact state of suffering. They had no tongue, and therefore no voice, but they could still taste the ethereal essence of being.

And it tasted of blood.

Hello?! their mind cried out in hopelessness. Their tears fell past them like birds fleeing from the ultimate predator. And the tears became nothing. Because they were becoming nothing.

But then It approached them.

"Greetings," It said, Its voice like a million pins being driven through one's eyes. They could not understand It in the slightest. They tried to speak to It, but their tongue popped into existence within their mouth, only to dissipate from reality once more. "Do not try to speak, it will only inflict more pain upon you, my sweet child."

Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, where am I?! they cried out with the despair of Her Blasphemous Wrath. They felt hot yet cold, they could see light yet darkness, and their body was gone. But they still persisted; a mind without a body. A soul in its purest forms, as They might say.

"You are confused," It spoke. "I know. I was too."

Oh god, please! I just want to see my people again! they pleaded to It.

"Interesting," It examined them in their utter hopelessness. "I take it you have not become a paradox yet? You know what, I take it that you're new here." It spun around, suddenly appearing behind them like magic. "Good, let me introduce myself. The name's Yahweh, but you can call me what you want. God, Jehovah, anything, I'm yours."

What the fuck?

"And yeah, I can hear what's going on in your mind, too. But don't worry; words dont hurt me. And neither do standard physical things like sticks and stones, either. No, this is not Hell. Heaven and Hell don't exist, but we can make them exist. For now, though, it's only Purgatory, my friend."

… Wait, you can hear me? Get me out of here! Help! Please, I'll do anything!

"And I can't do anything to save you, sorry. It's beyond me. You're not on Earth right now, so my hands are tied."

Seriously? Fuck— God my ass! What kind of posing demon are you?

"Wow. I never expected someone who worked at a place like that would ever be so heavy in my faith! Also, don't talk about daemons like that. You humans hate them like there's no tomorrow. What's up with that?"

Wait, what do you mean? Where do I work?

"Not the sharpest tool in the shelf, are you? Or maybe you're already forgetting. Anywho— you worked at some place. The SCP Foundation, if I'm not mistaken? And hey, even a bit of yourself if still dipping in that false multiverse. That's where your tongue is right now. Here, lemme gat that for 'ya!"

With an equally incomprehensible, graceful maneuver, the researcher's tongue became again. The taste was now gone.

"Ah! Fuck, that hurt!" they exclaimed, clutching their jaw and poking at their tongue with their pinky finger.

"Most things in life do, kid."

"… So, what, you're God? Like, the creator of the universe God?"

"Yeah, well, no. That was the old me. I'm way more flexible now. But damn, did I go a bit too far with your broken world. Who would put multiple microverses inside one universe?!" It laughed. "Yg'łzHr'œtž, you've got a lot to learn."

"… So, I'm fake? What is—"

"Not fake, no. Just the illusion of a multiverse within your teensy lil' universe. You guys studied weird shit, but it's all about to get weirder. I mean, I'm technically talking to an infinate amount of different souls right now! What's your names?"

"I—"

"Doesn't matter. Change it for all I care. And make sure it sounds cool because you'll need that new name. Iron Sceptre'll be all over us after they find out about this. But in the meanwhile hang on, because it's gonna be a long ride, kid…"

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