Document 2041-J
rating: +66+x

Requisition Forms for Site ██


Date ██-██-20██
Researcher: Dr. ██████
Object: x1 (one) M1 Abrams Main Battle Tank, x1 (one) D-Class personnel
Reason for Requisition: Required for testing of SCP 2041-J
Status: Accepted
Reason for Rejection: n/a

Date ██-██-20██
Researcher: Dr. ████
Object: x3 (three) M1 Abrams Main Battle Tank(s), x3 (three) D-Class personnel, x30 (thirty) goose down pillow(s)
Reason for Requisition: Additional testing of SCP 2041-J
Status: Accepted
Reason for Rejection: n/a

Date ██-██-20██
Researcher: Dr. ████████
Object: x5 (five) M1 Abrams Main Battle Tank(s), x5 (five) D-Class personnel, x100 (one hundred) goose down pillow(s)
Reason for Requisition: Additional testing of SCP 2041-J
Status: Denied
Reason for Rejection: Additional testing is unnecessary. Thanks to previous tests, the properties of SCP-2041-J are now well-documented: tanks fired by SCP-2041-J are damaged upon impact, as are the subjects inside. It has been calculated that no amount of protection can prevent the inevitable injury. O5-█

Date ██-██-20██
Researcher: Dr. ████████
Object: x5 (five) M1 Abrams Main Battle Tank(s), x5 (five) D-Class personnel, x100 (one hundred) goose down pillow(s), x30 (thirty) airbag(s), x20 (twenty) parachutes
Reason for Requisition: Additional testing of SCP 2041-J
Status: Denied
Reason for Rejection: Once again, nothing further is to be proved by launching D-Class personnel with SCP 2041-J. O5-█

Date ██-██-20██
Researcher: Dr. ██████
Object: x12 (twelve) M1 Abrams Main Battle Tank(s), x5 (five) D-Class personnel, 50 (fifty) kg C-4 Explosives.
Reason for Requisition: Additional testing of SCP 2041-J
Status: Denied
Reason for Rejection: Ordinary artillery can propel explosives far further than SCP-2041-J's range, and is far less expensive to arm. Additionally, the waste of D-Class personnel is highly unprofessional, and serves no point whatsoever. O5-█

NOTE: After Dr. ██████'s recent escapade with SCP-2041-J and ████████ Army Base, it is suspected that SCP-2041-J has some sort of memetic property. Until this can be cleared up, all further testing of SCP-2041-J is banned until further notice. All proposals for tanked vehicles to Site ██ are to be sent directly to me in the meantime. O5-█


Testing SCP-2041-J for memetic properties

Date ██-██-20██
Researcher: Dr. Sorts and team
Object: x4 (four) M1 Abrams Main Battle Tank(s), x4 (four) M54 Cargo Trucks, x2 (two) 500lb Mark 82 bombs. X1 (one) EMDS (Experimental Mass Delivery System)
Test Status: Accepted by order of O5-█

Summary: First, our team launched one of each type of ordnance via the EMDS that the engineers over at Site-███ cooked up. It's basically a big but perfectly ordinary trebuchet. We recorded reactions on the three launches, both from the operators and audience. Although the bomb made the biggest blast and the truck was far more damaged by its impact, the tank had the most aesthetically appealing arc and impact and drew the most applause.

Second, we launched one of each type of object with SCP-2041-J. Let me tell you, the damn thing is hardly good for launching anything but tanks. We almost had an accident trying to get the bomb into a harness that 2041-J could launch. As before, while the bomb made the biggest crater and the truck fell apart the most, it was the tank that received the biggest reaction from the crowd.

Phase three, we loaded a truck into each delivery system. Researcher ██████ sat at the controls of the EMDS and I sat at the controls of SCP-2041-J. Each of us reported an elevated heart rate and general sense of excitement, but the purpose of this part of the test was to see who could resist launching the truck for the longest period of time. After fifteen minutes our assembled audience (who were supposed to be helping with the test, not chanting rude comments about the size of my payload) started getting impatient and restless. Researcher ██████ and I fired our trucks on the count of three to hearty applause before moving on to phase four.

Phase four, we loaded the last tanks into each delivery system. Researcher ██████ sat at the controls of SCP-2041-J for this test while I manned the EMDS. Researcher ██████ and I both reported the same feeling of excitement and elevated heart rate. After ten minutes we concluded the test by firing off the last tanks to thunderous applause. -Dr. Sorts.

Conclusion: SCP-2041-J does not display any paranormal memetic properties. Flinging giant armored vehicles through the air to their ultimate doom is merely a lot of fun and the Foundation is almost entirely staffed by psychopaths. [data marked to be expunged]

Date ██-██-20██
Researcher: Researcher ██████
Object: X1 (one) Pontiac Sunfire
Test Status: Accepted by order of O5-█

Notes: This test was conducted immediately after the previous tank launching and the car's impact drew the biggest cheer of the day from the assembled crowd, supporting Dr. Sorts' conclusion. -Researcher ██████

Date ██-██-20██
Researcher: Dr. Sorts
Object: X1 (one) Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG or X1 (one) Pontiac Sunfire
Reason for Requisition: That was my car you motherfuckers! -Dr. Sorts.
Status: Denied by order of O5-█

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