SCP Foundation

What is the Department of Miscommunications?

Founded by Dr. Eli Forkley, the Department of Miscommunications (DoMC) is a specialist division within the SCP Foundation, dealing with the following:

• Anomalies that manipulate language and communication in such a way as to be difficult to accurately describe.
• Anomalies that do the above in a way that makes them difficult to accurately contain.
• Anomalies that don't do those things, but appear to do so to the uninformed observer.
• The creation and maintenance of technologies, both linguistic and physical, which aid in the above.
• Exploring and regulating the nebulous cross-disciplinary space between the fields of memetics, linguistics, antimemetics, counterconceptuals, metaphysics, analytics, para- and exo-linguistics, and database management.

It is small by the standards of most departments, but extremely up-and-coming. They're ostensibly the folks who deal with anomalies like SCP-426 (I Am A Toaster); if it's tricky to talk about and document, they figure out ways to subvert it and pin it to paper.

What isn't the Department of Miscommunications?

The DoMC is not a division dealing with antimemetics. I cannot stress this strongly enough. SCP-4773-2 should be proof enough for anyone; when they do get their hands on them, they're grossly underqualified and horrendously out of their depth. As a general rule, they don't handle well things that hurt your brain on the inside. Words are one thing, thoughts are another. SCP-4288 is a good example of the outlier case, where the two are combined — look to it for a sense of what exactly 'fits'. Generally speaking, unless a clerical error or some other departmental mixup happens, non-communicatory perception-altering and memory-erasing anomalies should be kept as far off the table as possible.

So, you want to write something involving the Department of Miscommunications? Great! Here's some things you should remember:

1) Keep it original

The point of the DoMC, and arguably one of its greatest appeals, is that it's a challenge not just to come up with, but to write. We don't need a dozen identical format screws with the DoMC shoehorned into each. Break people's expectations over your knee and then push the envelope so hard it goes supersonic. If your format screw alone is carrying the article, it should be the best damn format screw the site's ever seen. Otherwise, try to do something clever or interesting while you're at it — we're supposed to be writers, after all.

2) Keep it sensible

These are not people with unlimited resources. They can't erase the memories of a country, or convince everyone to start speaking Latin instead of English. If something big needs doing, it should be handled as such: this is a pretty down-to-Earth and realistic group so-far (surprisingly, given their subject matter), and I'd rather it stay that way.

Of course, if you have an excellent idea for a universe-annihilating infohazard or a new meaning of life, it's your prerogative as a writer; just don't be surprised when everything else adheres to a different set of rules and ideas.

3) Keep it consistent

…to a certain degree, anyway. This is part GoI, part series, part canon, and consistent creation is a big part of that. Writing in other canons or settings is fine — we can make a new section under the database tab if and when that happens — but try to exist in a canon. Try not to write a scip where you explicitly contradict another article in what, for want of a better word, is the 'baseline' DoMC universe. That said, all rules are arbitrary, and nothing's set in stone. Good writing trumps all.

4) Keep it weird

This is a big one. The biggest, perhaps. In DoMC articles, things should be going on behind the scenes. There should be bigger things at play, or smaller things at work. Information should be hidden, or unavailable entirely. No matter the tone, no matter the themes, the DoMC revolves around mystery and revelation; whether or not you pull the curtain back is up to you, but there should always be a curtain in the first place. Or several curtains, or an intricately woven network of hundreds of curtains all misleading the reader away from the real curtain, which lies at the centre of the curtain-web like some kind of terrible spider-god of obfuscation. As with everything here, it's really up to you.

███-3955 — Eight Notes

"This one is Mister Measure. I call him that because he measures all the notes to see just what kind of notes they are, so clean. So clean Mister Measure."

Written by Henzoid.

SCP-4098 — S-C-P, easy as 19-3-16!

"Site-94's containment personnel sucked, crazy phenomenon started, couple people slain, created prototype, situation corrected promptly."

Written by Henzoid and Westrin.

SCP-4288 — Your Dirty Little Secret

"A first-hand retelling of something terrible. Try not to worry about it."

Written by stormbreath.

SCP-4352 — Storytime

"We weren't the first to do this job. Others came before us, and they were good at what they did."

Written by Henzoid and Tanhony.

SCP-001 — First and Foremost

"Be first, while god is second."

Written by Felixou

Dr. Michaels — Dr. Michaels is not in Danger

"We tried our best with this one, and despite everything… well, it's not over yet, I suppose. Hang in there, Jeremy."

Written by Lt Flops and Henzoid.

SCP-4467 — Oh, I Get It Now

"Our brightest moment. A triumph of linguistic engineering to subvert and overcome a particularly tricky anomaly."

Written by DarkStuff.

SCP-4473 — You Make Me Feel Like

"Let go of the context; it all trickles away eventually."

Written by Tanhony.

SCP-4517 — Not Very 𝒩

"A thing that's nothing except its objective quantities, and a hyper-subjective quality turned objectively objective. Just another day at the office."

Written by MaliceAforethought.

SCP-4773-2 — and a stuffed bear

"We fucked up, and fucked up bad. We're not trained for this sort of thing."

Written by MaliceAforethought and Henzoid.

SCP-5034 — The Meat Angels

"A bowl of marbles with certain linguistically anomalous properties."¹

Written by Tanhony.

FILE — SCP-INTEGER

"A self-abstracting HAZARD COMPLEX. NOTHING MORE."

Written by Placeholder McD

𝒫 — 𝒫 and the Little Party

"There, there, 𝒫. Everything is going to be alright."

Written by Henzoid.

SCP-5790 — [DATA KILLED]

"This is not the garden."

Written by MaliceAforethought.

SCP-5861 — Foxing

"I can't really talk about it here. That's kinda the point."

Written by Billith.

SCP-6470 — Omnipresent

"6. Continue learning, working and living normally. You may continue to pretend that nothing is by your side."

Written by Cryer Walker does not match any existing user name and tetsusquared.

SCP-7413 — Rhizomatic Serial Killer

"Several calls were made to the police precinct of northern ████████, ██████, USA, in which a low, androgynous voice stated "there is a killer on the loose" before hanging up."

Written by FLOORBOARDS.

International Database

SCP-CN-2989 — DEMONSTRATION OF THE PRECENCE

"Result: The object has been contained to the Department of Miscommunications."

Written and translated by Etinjat.

SCP-2434-JP — A Kettle

"Use of the product for purposes other than its intended usage will cause unpredictable harm to the user."

Written by Karathh. Translated by C-Dives.

Experimental Log of Containment Chamber ZH-S12-E-024

"GIVE ME BACK TO ME"

Written by AbyssDream. Translated by Mang Gwan.

SCP-CN-2991 — Why disbelieve ye in the revelations of Anormaly, when ye bear witness

"The cognition of Anormaly comes from reading text."

Written and translated by Etinjat.

SCP-ZH-220 — H.K.'s Everhome

"Despite SCP-ZH-220 having undergone several ownership transfers, Haren Kolva still holds ownership of SCP-ZH-220 and the associated land."

Written by ting129. Translated by Mang Gwan.

SCP-3288-JP — draft(4)

"The following document file was saved as a draft of a formal report."

Written by dr_toraya. Translated by C-Dives.

On Proper Miscommunication

"If people say they haven't heard of us, start laughing along to the joke. If they're laughing at the name, they're less likely to look into funny business."

Written by Anonymous.

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