Dr. Bridge Over Troubled Water
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Nota Bene: This was writted for an April Foll's Day contest, and misspellings were part of the jugging criteria.

Dr. Bridge was board at his desk. He was known all over the Fondation for his epic feet with the Pokemon, but after that, reality felt so boring. So he desided to get 826 again and do sumthing cool again, expect with a book this time. He worried about how the SCP was ment for books and mite be unstable if he used it on another video game. So Dr. Bridge sneaked past the guards at the entrance to SCP-826's containmet sell. Ever sense the incident, they locked up the book kens in a sell, reclassing them as Eulicked. Safe classication was only for items that were predicktable, and the Fondation didn't predict that it could do video games.

So Dr. Bridge went and got a book from his liberry. It was his favrite, cause it was about a boat salling on the ocean and his name was Bridge so he felt a special kinship with it because bridges go over water and the ocean is water. The water in this book was especially impotent because the book was Moby Duck and it had an evil wail in it! Bridge vowed to fight the evil wail and become epic again, cause people semened to forget about him now that it had ben so long sense the Pokemon thing.

So he sneaked past all the guards who were really intimate with there guns and Keller vests, but he wasn't afraid because he was Dr. Bridge. He put Mob Dick in the kens and waited. Then suddenly, he was on a boat and all the people gatted around him. "Who the hell are ye and wherefore are ye in my boat, ye scurvy stowaway?" demanded a voice that Bridge knew was Caption Ahab.

He quickly thought of an excuse for his anchor nistic clothes and randomly appeering on the Peequad. "I'm a follow wailer and I want to kill Moby Dick too!" he shouted. "Mody Dick bit my brother's head off and now he has a head made out of wail bone like your peg leg!"

Caption Ahab snarled at the reminder of Moby Dick's terrible deads. "Then ye be one of me crew, me hardy!" he said. His first mate Starbucks, who invented coffee, quickly went to the crom's nest. "Caption! Thar she blows!"

Bridge new it was the epic fight now. He groped a spear and yelled, "I'll handle this!" He and Arab went out on canoes to the water where the great white wail was menacingly. Moby Dink shot water out of his hole at Ahab, who fell overbored and was fished up by Ishmale. "It's up to me now!" Bridge realized, and stealed his nerves. After all, he defected Pokemon. A wail was nothing.

Mony Dick opened his big moth and Bridge saw the book kens in his moth. He realized he had to sacfirice himself…it was the only way out of the SCP. He jumped into the wail welding his spear and screaming epically. As he toughed the books, he stabbed the great white wail and killed him forever. Even though he only knew Ahab for a short time, he was glad his caption's vengence was complete.

He went out of the book universe and knew he couldn't sneak past the guards this time, because Lament and Dodrig were looking at the screen like last time where it showed his aventures and probably reported him to the sight security because there good employees. He knew it was nesessery for him to get cot so that people would know the epic story of him killing the wail, but he stealed himself for trouble.

He was in a meating with the O5s, who were lectoring him on using SCPs for personal fun. But then one of them assed, "Even though this is a broach of protocol and you will be consequenced, I'm curious to know how you managed to do such an epic feet like killing the great white wail! In the origami story everybody died when they tried to do that!"

"It's simple," Bridge smiled and explanted to the awwed O5. "When it's a contest between me and the wiled ocean, I'll always come out on top. The result will always be…Dr. Bridge over troubled water."

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