Hey Author,
I was really fascinated by the concept of your scip, but I think I could use some polishing.
Firstly, why is it restricted to Level 2 personnel, the article should make me believe that there is a reason for this, but there appears to not be one.
Secondly, I think you really need to add more to your Special Containment Procedures. It might be difficult to contain, but so are many other scips. Part of the fascination some readers (including myself) find in scips is looking at the containment procedure and wondering why they have to do _ to SCP-#### or why they need five feet of concrete to stop the Monster from the Black Lagoon.
For instance, you could say there is an MTF or AI whose purpose is to track down and locate footage, that the Foundation may use CCTV to locate possible instances, or that the Foundation flags individuals who are likely to have an SCP-4936 manifestation.
Thirdly, I think you may have missed a bullet point for your last descriptor.
So generally speaking, within my experience, most authors put Discovery, not History, because while the words seem similar, History would be if you are telling me a list of instances and Foundation interaction with the object, while how you are using it, seems like Discovery, which is also generally an Addendum.
While I'm on the topic of addendums yours kind-of pulls me out of the scip. My suspension of disbelief is lost because it seems extremely unlikely that 7 out of the first 11 are the only ones who
required direct Foundation intervention to maintain information security.
What pulled me out specifically was the lack of a some. What would've made more sense would be:
The following is a list of some SCP-4936 subjects whose lifestyle changes required direct Foundation intervention to maintain information security.
Now, if there isn't a wide sample size then this would make sense but then you would have the obvious problem of how did the establish this scip exists and wasn't just a string of coincidences. The Foundation may break Thermodynamics every morning, but we still follow the Scientific Method, otherwise, we would make the Man who was struck by lightning seven times a scip because the dude was unlucky. We have to establish that this thing exists and wasn't just 11ish women who acted slightly similarly. There are 3.5ish billion women out there, some of them are bound to be similar in certain ways.
Now some grammar! Fun.
Subject ages range from their/the early twenties to early forties and are often:
or exhibits other anti-social traits that renders their lifestyle
And there are a couple of others. Please download some kind of Grammar/Spelling checker because we should maintain professionalism. I use Grammarly, cause it's free and it works.
Kudos:
One of the main things I really like about this scip is its concept. Similar to the 4999 making sure everyone has their death with someone, I really like the idea of a magical or mystic entity making the world better by reforming parts of humanity.
I also loved the professional looking banner and picture. Those things always bring scips to life.
I really see potential in this scip and I want it to come to fruition. It just needs some polishing.
