First SCP needs a lot of critique
First SCP needs a lot of critique
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» First SCP needs a lot of critique
So, I'm going to start with the major issues I have, then mention some of the minor mistakes I noticed.
First off, I'm not entirely clear what concept you're going for here. Is the anomaly an info-hazardous corrupted data entry? Is it an anomalous terminal containing said entry? Is it an AIC that is communicating through said entry? Your use of pronouns compounds this issue ("Currently it is being stored…" - what is the "it" here? The entry? The physical terminal?
Second, the main "anomaly" here seems to simply be data corruption. That's not an anomaly - data corruption is a real thing that actually happens, and doesn't really need to be contained by the foundation. Sure, it may possibly have been created by an anomaly during the redacted containment breach, but that doesn't inherently make it anomalous - just because SCP-682 said "they were…disgusting" in an interview log doesn't make that phrase dangerous in any way.
Furthermore, while I do like the reference to Task Force Kappa-10 (I've only recently read about them myself, but they seem interesting, and I like efforts to create more works involving them), I'm not sure this is the best task for them. As mentioned, data corruption is not anomalous. Unless there's something actively preventing data recovery, or there's some desperate need for information that was corrupted, why should these AICs, which some people still probably don't trust (the team name is "Skynet". Suspicion is bound to happen.), be put on active duty recovering data?
Honestly, I don't think this is a good SCP. I think it might make for an interesting tale, especially depending on what exactly is contained within the terminal, but if you're going to do that, you should make the tale first then add an SCP entry second. Use Hello, World as an example - it features MTF Kappa-10 doing being formed due to the extreme urgency of the situation - people are dying at an alarming rate, and the Foundation's only lead required digital agents. They do their thing in the virtual world, and we get to be there along side them. This makes the eventual SCP article - SCP 2522 - that much more interesting. I recommend you try figuring out a reason that terminal is so important, then make a tale, telling us about what Kappa-10 does inside the terminal, how they deal with the corrupted data, and all that stuff. If you do, remember - 8-Ball was their encryption specialist. He was the one who could open a secure channel to Alexandra from within Cipher City. He's now stuck permanently containing 2522, so he's not available. Unless they have a new team member, that likely means no contact with the outside world until they return.
Of course, you could always choose to just try reworking the SCP article to make things clearer. If you do, there are a few smaller issues I noticed that you should probably fix:
As a courtesy to our readers on mobile devices, please collapse long posts. ~Zyn
1. The encryption. First off, the form of encryption used would be a method of cryptography, not cryptology. The latter includes breaking codes, which I assume was not your intent. Second, in general, an internet connection should not be provided to anomalous computers. Intranet would be a better option. An internet connection means connecting it to outside networks, likely the world wide web, which is extremely counterproductive to containment. An intranet connection means hooking it up to some other local computers, allowing you to access the anomalous computer without risking the anomaly escaping.
2. You seem to have forgotten to include an object class in the *actual* SCP part. The "copy" of the SCP includes one, but the article doesn't. I would probably recommend safe, unless there's something big I missed - if you seal away the terminal and disconnect it from anything, it's not going to do anything at all.
3. I would recommend putting the corrupted document as either an addendum or a tab. Having it just sitting on top of the actual thing is a bit confusing, both because a reader might think the article is corrupted (suggesting anti-memetic properties) and because it goes against standard formatting for SCPs.
4. "Mobile Task Force Kappa 10 ("Skynet") has been assigned to monitor, and through the use of AICs, explore the contents of the terminal further." It's probably unnecessary to specify "and through the use of AICs". Kappa-10 is composed entirely of AICs. If their doing the exploring, then the exploration is being done "through the use of AICs".
Thanks I will try to get most of your input in hopefully by this weekend if not later on next week. As I said I am quite in need of help so the feedback is appreciated.
It has been a while unfortunately, but I finally am back. I got some new inspiration, and some of the finer details need fleshed out as well, but over all I put together a new idea that I had a bit more of a grasp on. It is substantially longer though than what I originally thought it would be. It is still not done, and I plan on adding more to it over time while I can.
/forum/t-10126594/first-scp-needs-a-lot-of-critique#post-
page revision: 3, last edited: 22 Sep 2018 03:57
