Here is the draft. I took a lot of cues from articles like SCP-1875 when trying to tell my story. The original article needed a story to go along with the cool concept, so this is what I attempted. Any kind of feedback is appreciated. :)
First off, it's normal to use SCP-XXXX as a placeholder instead of assigning a number to the article while still in the Sandbox, the number you want may not be available by the time you go to publish.
the blade will stop 3/4 of the way through the ground and become obstructed by a solid object.
Instead of "through the ground" might want to change to "into the ground". Otherwise, it sounds like you are digging 3/4 of the way to the center of the Earth. Also, the last part has issues… The tone is off. Maybe, "3/4 of the way into the ground and will strike something solid." Sounds better. I have problems with how that whole paragraph is worded.
Upon usage of the shovel, the tool will strike human remains directly below the shovel's point of entry, regardless of what was beneath the surface prior to excavation, or what material is dug into.
Redundant use of "usage" since you've already said that you're using the shovel and it is striking something solid. Let's try re-writing the whole paragraph:
If SCP-1747-1 is used on any ground normally penetrable by an ordinary shovel, the blade will stop 3/4 of the way through the ground and become obstructed by a solid object. Upon usage of the shovel, the tool will strike human remains directly below the shovel's point of entry, regardless of what was beneath the surface prior to excavation, or what material is dug into. Origin and method of placement of said bodily remains are currently unknown and under investigation.
"If SCP-XXXX-1 is used on any surface normally penetrable by a non-anomalous shovel, the blade will stop 3/4 of the way into the surface as though obstructed by a solid object. If the area is excavated further, human remains will be found directly below the shovel's point of entry regardless of what was beneath the surface prior to digging or what material is being excavated. Origin of said remains and how they are placed is currently unknown and under investigation."
The individual was complaining of her cat constantly entering the cemetery at 18:00 every night for █ weeks.
"The caller stated that her cat had been entering the cemetary at 6:00 PM every evening for the past █ weeks."
Agent M██████ was sent to investigate the anomaly, and contacted Site-██ following the investigation of the cemetery.
"Agent M██████ was sent to investigate the anomaly, and contacted Site-██ following an investigation of the cemetery."
The call had since been traced and the individual has been administered Class-B amnestics.
"The call had since been traced, and the individual given Class-B amnestics."
At approx. 8:00 pm a black domestic cat (Felis catus) will enter SCP-1747-2 and proceed to place a Violet Tulip infront of two tombstones. The tombstones belong to two children, Amy Edwards, and Scarlette Edwards. The cat will then leave SCP-1747-2 before SCP-1747-3Ξ and SCP-1747-3Ψ can manifest.
Couple of issues here…
black domestic cat (Felis catus)
The species designation really isn't needed. Doesn't add anything to the story.
place a Violet Tulip
Unnecessary caps. Also, where is a cat getting a tulip from? Need some explanation for that.
infront of
Spacing issue. Should be "in front of"
SCP-1747-3Ξ and SCP-1747-3Ψ can manifest.
I would change from Greek symbols to lower case letters. Some people's systems may not display properly.
SCP-1747-3Ξ and SCP-1747-3Ψ can not be studied in close range, making the physical description of them hard to document.
What about long range photography? Can they be photographed?
SCP-1747-3 appears to use SCP-1747-1 to dig at the graves of Scarlette and Amelia Edwards every night for approx. five minutes, if they encounter one of SCP-1747-1's carcasses, they will both remove the body and continue digging.
Long run-on sentence. I would suggest a period between "five minutes" and "if they".
Also, do not abbreviate approximately. It breaks clinical tone.
The location of SCP-1747-1 is always leaning against the two tombstones in SCP-1747-2.
"SCP-XXXX-1 will always be found leaning against the tombstones of Scarlette and Amelia Edwards when the manifestion begins regardless of where it was previously. It will vanish from its current location and appear within SCP-XXXX."
Screams were heard from the Site-876 outpost and SCP-1747-3Ξ through SCP-1747-3Ψ were visible enough to witness them comforting one another.
Need more explanation of this. It's unclear what is happening exactly. Are the screams originating from Site-876 Outpost? How many other instances of SCP-XXXX-3 are there? Writing it as 3Ξ through 3Ψ implies more than two.
On the █/█/██ several instances of Violet Tulip's
Leave out "the" and unnecessary caps.
sprouted around the two tombstones, along with several domestic black cats.
Black cats are sprouting out of the ground like flowers? Cool!
Overall, there's not a lot of development here. The footnotes allude to a more interesting story, but it's not presented in the article. There is definitely a start of a good story here, but it goes nowhere.
Okay! Going off of MadCatUSA's critique, here is the updated draft, with a clearer story than before.
I had to force myself to get to the ending. You need to have some kind of hook right from the start to carry the audience to the ending. You aren't writing an SCP as much as you are trying to write a story. Work on the elements more so the spoilers you've listed are not so evocative. This has a lot of potential, but you are really missing an opportunity here with the procedures. Get a good hook going and you're half way there.
You need to have some kind of hook right from the start to carry the audience to the ending.
I think I've fixed that problem by adding in a few extra containment procedures.
You aren't writing an SCP as much as you are trying to write a story.
I'm not exactly sure what you mean by this. I thought all SCP articles needed some kind of story to them?
Okay, I've done a rewrite of my rewrite (if that makes any sense), thanks to Jekeled for helping me with this rewrite, as well as
MadCatUSA and
LurkD for their help in the little things. I've redone the story to be a lot simpler and less stupid, and the formatting has gotten a quick touch-up. Enjoy!
audio recordings revealed that the words "Hugo", "Please", and "I want to see my children" were being said by the entity.
I would re-word this a bit. It's clunky as it stands now. "audio recordings revealed the words: "Hugo", "Please" and "I want to see my children" being repeated over and over. The sounds were only captured on recordings and were not audible to observers."
See: Wikipedia: EVP
At the time of writing this documentation, SCP-1747-2 has not manifested to continue its excavation event in over four days.
Again a little clunky. "At the time of this documentation, SCP-XXXX-2 has not manifested in over four days."
It is assumed that SCP-1747-2 will not manifest in the future, and SCP-1747 pending reclassification to neutralized.
Never "ASSUME". You know what it stands for, right? "It is presumed that SCP-XXXX-2 will not manifest further. SCP-XXXX will be monitored pending re-classification to Safe."
SCP-XXXX-1 still is anamolous, correct? Therefore it can never be classified as "Neutralized."
Other than what I've pointed out, it looks good to me. I leave it in the hands of more experienced reviewers pending further edits.