non-foundation
"Foundation" should be capitalised, as it is a proper noun.
SCP-XXXX was first classified as Thaumiel and excited Foundation personnel as it was first estimated that it could be a useful chemical for the foundation.
Phrasing here is odd. We have three clauses here: "classified as Thaumiel", "excited Foundation personnel" and "it was first estimated…"
Are you trying to say that the SCP is "classified Thaumiel and excited Foundation personnel, as it…" or "classified Thaumiel, and excited Foundation personnel hypothesised that it could be…"?
Due to the American Army first discovering
It should be "American Army's". Apostrophe s please.
This draft is rather boring, I would say. It tries to relate to something that happened in RL, and my personal rule of thumb is that it ought to be more than what the world already knows. That all this article adds on is that the Imperial Japanese made it and the US want it as their experiments, which is what happened in RL (hence a repetition in pre-existing concepts ad infinitum).
The first part of the SCP (the gas agent) feels utterly stale. And the article does is to claim that it has such effects, but there is no empirical proof of it. It could be false, an exaggeration for all we know.
The second part of the SCP (Ourang Medan) probably shouldn't be an SCP. Its only tie to the gas agent is that it was holding said agent. Did whatever happened onboard changed the ship such that it is now anomalous and have to be sunk to stop it? Explore more on what happened on that ship, and how a gas agent link to it.
