I'm not entirely sure if the grammatical/mechanical/phrasing errors are intentional given that the tone is far from clinical ("constanly" and other misspellings, don't capitalize words after "SCP-XXXX" if they're in the same sentence, only use "it's" when you can replace the word with "it is", capitalize "Agent" when using it as a title in someone's name, capitalize "Foundation" when using it as a proper noun, etc.) but those really make it a slog to read through this.
As for the joke itself… I don't get it. The containment is excessively complicated because… bacon? It turns people into bacon? Also cooks raw bacon? And there's a crystal ball in there, because… reasons?
It just seems too random and as a result, it doesn't really seem like a joke to me so much as some person ranting about a story where things just get more and more complicated and too convoluted to be coherent.
What's the joke here? Is it some reference to a popular media thing I'm not aware of?