Yo, I've reached what I hope is the final form of my SCP (before mainlist posting) and I'd like someone to critique it. Like, I'm looking for the most brutal critique you've got so that I can make this the best that's possible.
Going through this…
I'm not really sold on the concept. So it's a phone that receives signal anywhere. By itself, that's not very interesting. Why does it need a nuclear battery (and how would one of those even work) and a particular accelerator? It's described as being radioactive, but it's never made clear why those are necessary for it to function.
The science behind the radiation is a little flawed. Exposure to large quantities of radiation would causes someone to fall ill, not vaporize. It's also possible to design radiation-resistant electronics.
The test logs really don't add anything we don't already know. Neither do the doctors' notes. "This is science fiction"? They work for the Foundation. Everything is science fiction.
The background and recovery log suffer from a lot of logical issues. Why didn't the Foundation know about this ahead of time, how was he able to access things without permission, etc? The Foundation is far more competent than that.
The crosslinks are clever, but the concept needs work. Take it over to Ideas and Brainstorming, refine your idea, and then redraft it. As it stands, the concept just isn't that interesting.
Thank you for your critiques! I did my best to fix the issues you listed, so it should be a bit better now. If you want to look at it again, I'd like any other critiques that you can think of. Thanks again!