In general, I am not impressed by the Tale. This hardly deviates from the style of other Orientation Tales and the use of a self-referential casual "tough guy"-type of tone.
The actual content of the talk feels lacklustre, for they boil down to the six points and they are peppered by the "tough guy" talk as a garnish. If they are presented in a format of a presentation, they should style like one. It is, after all, a presentation in a work setting, and should act like that too. The casual tone used here derails the context of a presentation while at work badly. There is no reason to use that tone (other than to make readers chuckle briefly), since the agents would be adults ready for their mission. It is not wrong to use humour, but they are overtly used here that the gravity of the context is lost.
Thus, add meaningful content and conduct world-building in the inner workings of handling anomalous objects on the field. I will recommend to read up on GOC Lectures and Orientations under the "Supplemental" tab in this page, which conveyed world-building via the orientation sub-genre and offer bitesize humour to give a little personality to it.