Here is my entry for the 3000 contest. I hope that you enjoy it - for particular values of "enjoy".
A huge number of people reviewed this draft, and I am very grateful to everyone for their help and thoughts.
- Thank you for review and comment to:
- sirpudding, for being the first to show support and get the ball rolling, and for being the first person to spot the actual ending before publication.
- shaggydredlocks, for helping restructure the logs and coming up with ideas for the ending. May trapdoor spiders never make nests in your throat as you sleep.
- Skerples, for some hard truths and for suggesting "The Creepy Meat Cave: an Agent Cooper and Agent Rey story (now featuring Catalan Slang and Banter)" as an alternative title.
- Petrograd, for forcing me to reconsider pacing and ditch the drone camera.
- djkaktus, for giving me a vote of confidence on chat, and for realising that the draft was screaming at you.
- Bluemorpho, for becoming mildly obsessed with the draft and making some good suggestions - sorry I didn't do anything to undermine that trope a bit more.
- Communism will win, for realising that this wasn't random bullshit like you're expecting.
- Hercules Rockefeller, for very detailed review, and for reading and re-reading the various alternate endings this had in the drafting process.
- DrMagnus and many others for reading this on chat and providing your thoughts. Sorry if I've forgotten to mention anyone!
- The use of human spines for limbs was inspired by this wonderful image at "Behind You", which I am linking mostly to encourage everyone to go and read all of that webcomic. Seriously, it's terrific.
- Initial image of Sagrada Familia - Wikimedia commons: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sagrada_Fam%C3%ADlia
- Image of recovered materials of -1 instances is a combination of:
- Scaly-foot gastropod - Wikimedia commons under CCA-SA 3.0: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Three_populations_of_Chrysomallon_squamiferum.jpg
- Spines - are a 3D model created by Zygote media group and used with permission from the owner: https://www.zygote.com/poly-models/3d-human-skeleton/3d-human-spine
- Historic image of Sagrada Familia under construction - Wikimedia commons under public domain: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Sagrada_Familia_1915.jpg
- Spiral staircase (also from Sagrada Familia, for those who may not have recognised it) - Wikimedia commons under CCA-SA 3.0: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Sagrada_Fam%C3%ADlia._Torres_(escales_helico%C3%AFdals).jpg
- Jumpscare image - Joaquin Villaverde (Flickr) under CCA-by-NC-SA 2.0: https://www.flickr.com/photos/soamplified/4845509230

Sorry about that, but spoilers aren't part of the way this works. Sometimes you're better off knowing less.