Hmmm. Okay, gave you a quick skim. Comments made as I read:
- Don't use bold for emphasis. It looks unprofessional.
- "need to know bases only." > should be "basis".
- "nature The Foundation" > no need to capitalize "the". You don't write, "I'm going to The Walmart". Same applies to the Foundation.
- "sea faring craft" > seafaring is one word.
- "Two Destroyers, three patrol boats and one Aircraft Carrier" > destroyer and aircraft carrier don't need to be capitalized.
- All the parentheses and strikethroughs are really distracting. Is all that really necessary?
- "Due to the nature of SCP-XXXX increasing the perimeter was necessary to prevent" > in-universe, it's assumed that containment's in place for a good reason. You don't need fluff text like this padding the instructions. Just give the instructions.
- "Task Force Hansel" > is this meant to be an MTF? If so, the naming doesn't follow the usual pattern, which has a Greek letter, a number, and (usually) a nickname.
- "made entirely out of discarded gum" > "made entirely" is a little bit too casual, for me. Also, what kind of gum? Chewing gum? Tree gum? If wikipedia has a disambiguation page for it, it's probably worth specifying.
- "The most common examples are Ferns or high grass made from Winter Green gum, bodies of water like creeks or small ponds made of Spearmint" > this is… not really professional-sounding. It's more along the lines of a child describing a movie. No need to capitalize "ferns". Also, bodies of water are not flora.
- "take on a more fanciful nature." > again, not very clinical-sounding. "Fanciful" can be interpreted in a variety of ways, and it's not really objective enough to serve as a scientific wording in this context.
- "SCP-XXXX-1 is the designation given to any children that appear on the island." > At this point I started getting a little bored. We've got plenty of islands with random humanoids on it. Why does this need humans at all?
- "Since its discovery the island has grown at a constant rate of 2 km^2 or 0.8 million tons per year which is approximately equal to the amount of gum chewed and discarded each year around the world." > this essentially spoonfeeds the plotline to the reader, and it seems kind of too blunt for me.
- "the Foundation funded a Herculean effort to stop all sales of sugar chewing gum and encourage the public to chew sugar-free gum instead. Despite the Foundation's best efforts sugar chewing gum is still wildly popular around the world" > this sounds like a heck of a lot more work than makes sense. The Foundation doesn't even know if people chewing gum is actually causing the island to expand. Why bother wasting all those resources?
I dunno. Why is this Keter? I'm pretty sure ordinary household items (vinegar, if I recall correctly?) can be used to dissolve gum, so why doesn't the Foundation use that to keep the size in check? Alternatively, compress some of the gum on the edges or something.
I'm not really in love with the way it's presented. The main thing preventing me from taking it seriously is the lack of clinical tone, but before that's addressed, the pacing of the work needs restructuring. I'm personally not convinced that you really need the candy children or the candy soldiers, since I've seen plenty of anomalous populations on islands and I feel like having humanoids detracts from the charm of the chewing gum island itself.
How many people liked this idea in the original brainstorming thread?