SCP Foundation

Just a heads up, but the Drafts and Critiques forum is used to get feedback so that the author can revise their own drafts. In short: no one is going to revise your draft for you. However, the feedback provided will steer you in the right direction and give you an idea of what needs to be fixed/expanded on.

That being said, here's some things that stuck out to me:

• Your missing a space between the item number and object class.

There is to be a 1 Kilometer fence off of SCP 2166.

As in surrounding it? Additionally, SCP 2166 should be written as SCP-2166.

No personal

personal -> personnel

if any machinery inside SCP 2166 is to activate, notify Outpost security team.

Missing capitalization here. Additionally, all of the underlining is unnecessary.

the initial building is about 350 meters wide

Same as above, the first letter of every new sentence should be capitalized.

• The description of the instances is really vague and aside from wandering around the facility and making noises, I have no idea what's anomalous about them. This feels like the beginning of an idea, but there's no real meat to it and the lack of information presented here only supports that fact. This never really goes anywhere and the events that transpire in the exploration log don't really correlate with what is presented in the description -the rust-like cavities found in the corpses, for example. Aside from that fact, a lot of the dialogue is missing capitalization -which is a recurring theme throughout the article- and a lot of the dialogue feels stiff and unbelievable. For example:

>C-1: Alright boys get your cams on!
>C-4: So I can leave my mic off?
>C-2: No smart a-

This isn't really a great way to start the log off, honestly. Generally, I don't mind if there's a joke tossed in there every now and again, but starting off a log this way really sets the tone for the rest of the log.

>C-1: Oh shit when did the clicking get so loud?
>C-2: Sir I hear somethi-
*C-2's camera, and mic cuts off while the sound of what seems to be C-2 screaming*
>C-1: Marshal! weapons hot we don't know what's gonna come up next!
>C-6: Yes si-

This is a nitpick, but I just have a hard time believing a trained Mobile Task Force would freak out so much over one small thing, and the fact they go in and get annihilated almost instantly without learning anything about this anomaly kind of makes the log feel a bit pointless.

All in all, I dunno about this. The concept is extremely vague and could benefit from being developed and explained better, because it's hard to form a mental picture of what this anomaly is and what it really does that warrants documentation and containment. A couple things you could answer within your draft to provide it with some narrative support would be as follows:

• Who created these entities and why?
• What relationship do they have with one another?
• What is their purpose? Do they perhaps have motives of their own?
• How do they effect the world around them or the individuals they come into contact with?

As is, the idea that these entities attack and kill individuals at random and seem to have no meaning behind their existences makes them come across as Generic Monsters with no real narrative support. Try to get away from form and function and start thinking about what kind of story you want your article to tell.