SCP Foundation

I decided to do something different.

http://scpsandbox2.wikidot.com/bentu

Start from Tab Tranquility 1950 and proceed from there. Yes, it was inspired by SCP-2317.
Note that the final format will probably consist of several separate pages linked chronologically. I'm open to changing anything at all, including images and videos.

All images and footage used in the draft are under the public domain, but I won't be linking sources here for conciseness.

I just finished adding a second possible story end (Thanks to the The Great Hippo), with several other edits packed in. The two stories split at 1962. Tell me which works best! Also, I'm kind of curious about how crosslinking would work in this situation.

Any feedback is greatly appreciated. Thank you!

I think that it is interesting, it does start out of the gate REALLY slow. The researcher is right, why would they think this is some anomaly? Though as it progresses…to put it in the most cliche of words…the plot thickens. The ending is set just far enough in the future that it's not something where we will be saying stuff like "well, the earth was supposed to end in 10 years, 11 years latter we're being told it will end in 10 years." Still, 15 years is fairly short in the whole scope of things, and at the same time, in 15 years this site might not even exist…in 15 years, I might be a CEO, in 15 years I might have a wife…scratch that last one, no one would even date me :P.
The ending also feels…sad…just…a final word before the end…a bed time story before we never wake up…

I like it. Though the multiple pages, at least for the last tab a separate page, would help keep people from reading the foot notes before hand.
I can't critique the brashness of the article seeing as how I am the most brash, sarcastic, and blunt person I know.

Very ambitious and interesting, but overlong. A big issue I noticed is that the blue text doesn't actually denote everything that's changed, in which cas why is it there at all? Other than that, it feels pretty derivative, partly of 2317, but even more so of 3002 which also involves a hostile memetic agent threatening the world with a cliffhanger ending featuring O5s.

I'd like to second the point about the blue text. It gives the impression that certain sections can be skipped because of repeated information (which people will likely be inclined to do, given the length of the piece,) when that doesn't seem to actually be the case. I assume this was to create the impression of a living document on top of the multiple file iterations, but I don't think it's necessary.

On the body of the piece itself:

I hope that helps!

EDIT: Accidentally hit post before I was finished writing. The full critique will be up shortly.

OK, here's my critique, for real this time. Sorry this took so long.

Initial Thoughts

This is pretty ambitious, and the story is interesting, but the layout of it could definitely stand to be improved. The overall plot is engaging and decently paced, and the images and gifs are excellent. However, there are some issues with the wording of some things, and I'm not fully sold on the multi-page format or the ending yet.

Line By Line

Overall Thoughts

My biggest concerns with this are how exactly you plan to present the different pages, and the ending. The former is my larger concern so I'll address that first.

Having several different pages like this is a form of format screw. The thing about format screws is that you always need to have an in-universe reason them. You have all of these different articles, and it makes sence for them to exist in universe, but how are you going to justify showing them all at the same time? Without an in-universe reason, you end up with a gaping plot hole.

There are several possible ways to justify the use of multiple pages. You could try to consolidate everything into one page, although this would require a great deal of effort and I don't recommend it. There's also the possiblity of hiding things in collapsibles or using the offset function popularized by SCP-2998. Regardless of what you end up doing, I think you should use the media contaminating effect of this entity as a justification. How you do it is up to you.

As for the ending? It may just be me, but I personally think the "last iteration is of a world ending breach" is a bit overdone. Others might disagree however, and I personally could headcannon my way to a justification of it (see my earlier thoughts on using the media contaminating effect).

How Close is This to Being Ready?

I think this is about 1 or 2 revisions away from being post worthy. You have all of you material together, and now it's just a matter of spot fixes and assembly. I can see this being pretty successful once it's done, and in case I hadn't made it clear before, I applaud your ambition and creativity. You've done some great work here.

The start page seems to be a reasonable starting point, but it's the later portions that raise concern.

It feels odd that the 1958 version is filed in as an SCP, since the writing indicates that they are very sceptical of it being anomalous. Perhaps rewording it as an Anomalous Object undergoing evaluation for anomalies would be more suitable than listing it as an SCP outright.

I also think it draws itself out too much. It took until the 1962 version before readers know the actual anomaly. Before that, we're just told that it is anomalous without clear description of what's anomalous with it. If anything, the 1960 version provided the video as something new and the 1961 version provided the breach as something new. Besides that, they are quite minor changes. Perhaps you can take a page from SCP-2998 and use blue text to denote small bits of new info?

As for the 2032 version, I thin it's a bit ambiguous. If I deduce from the 1962 version, it seems that the Foundation is succumbing to the SCP's effects and unleashing their SCPs en masse, perhaps to stop whatever coming their way. If that's what you're showing, I think making it more cohesive would help (something like a timeline of events to show the escalation). It would be interesting to see the Foundation unleash their horrors in full force, just to stop an unknown threat in full paranoia.

Also, what's with some of the SCPs linking to articles that are not their number? Some alternate universe thing?