Just wanted to give special thanks to Mackenzie and Quikngruvn for help refining this one in chat!
Date: 02 Dec 2011 14:13
Number of posts: 35
RSS: New posts
I love the focus put on the seperate channels, leaving a lot up to the reader to imagine what MC&D was doing to those people, or what groups may have had it before in order to observe the other high-value individuals. Plus, I like to think the woman who murdered the Japanese businessman was a cannibal.
Anyway, point is I see this as a wonderful example of working past just "thing with anomalous property." The story really does make a good deal of an article.
This has its good points, but the writing is a bit clumsy for me to upvote right now. I like the contents of the channels though. The O5 note didn't seem terribly earth-shattering to me, not sure what others see as the big deal with it.
Wording and tone issues:
dissipate instantly and harmlessly into the air when or is opened or pierced.
upon ingestion the compartment was suddenly empty.
link expires when the marked individual does and compartment '4' once again contained SCP-1089-p.
She has never been observed to smile
Every time as has been observed has been the same food-paste and the same plain grey dress.
has been deemed largely a waste of time.
so that observation would yield more data than "still in solitary confinement"
Otherwise pretty good.