You do not use SPCs.
Date: 04 Feb 2012 08:45
Number of posts: 98
RSS: New posts
There's still one in the pic description
Woops. Missed a few.
I'm sorry; I obviously wasn't paying enough attention. I probably shouldn't have posted this late at night. Thank you for fixing my mistake.
You know, at first glance I thought it was a serial killing clocks that hunted down other clocks and killed them, collecting their arms as trophies. That sounded really cool. Reading trough the article though… T - Minus x time units until doooom is just… not as cool. Also the clock itself feels a bit smartarse. An hour until you do this, an hour until you do that. Annoying.
You reference the shark punching committee one too many times in this article, aside from that I like it.
You're gonna want to revise this though. There are lots of tone issues, and the logs could be condensed. Consider throwing some of them into a collapsible.
EDIT: I forgot to mention the picture on the bottom freaked me out. Good placement.
SPC-1032-08 has been deemed irrelevant.
You might want to change that.
Okay, let's taking anything interesting about this article, and [DATA EXPUNGED] it!
Living the dream, or dreaming the life?
I didn't think the SCP would put details of its own demise anywhere that all its employees would see it. Which expungeds do you think I should replace with actual information? All of them?
The group is called "The Foundation", not "The SCP". SCP in this case functions as an adjective, not a noun. Only hipster bands are allowed to call themselves "The (adjective)".
Eh. That second picture is too goofy looking for me.
I like the idea of a clock that counts down multiple, apparently unrelated but nevertheless interesting things at once. Like "Humor" and "The end of the SCP Foundation." I wanted to know what other things it was counting down.
If you fixed up that part, made it less EXPUNGED and more interesting, it'd be great. Also, perhaps get rid of the "crying/killing clocks" part completely. I don't think that adds anything, but that's just me.
I'll withhold my vote for now. As far as my tastes go, this has potential.
Now. The thing here is , that while both concepts are interesting (the second one I could totally see as wondertainment item - you know, Kill an alarm toy) they don't work so well rammed together, just like the Human Centipede probably consisted of reasonable functional individuals before the joining.
That said, let's go to the article.
First problem I see is the "blah has been deemed irrelevant" stuff. Because it wasn't. It might be [REDACTED FOR BREVITY] in the SCP document which is a summary, but no way in fuck I can believe any foundation scientist would be able to get away with ignoring the object's action as above.
Hell, what about trying to preserve something just for the sake of checking whether the clock adjusts (hence it's bloody useful) or whether it just proves plain impossible somehow (and hence we're royally screwed)
Second problem is the first image. There's no white text on the hands there - you might want to try 'shopping something or changing that description bit somehow - perhaps all the lettering is small enough to require a magnifying glass at least?
Third thing that punched me in the face was the "containing no batteries" bit. I know it's completely true, but if I see an obviously mechanical alarm clock, the absence of batteries doesn't surprise me the least, nor do I feel important to note it in the first place.
As an aside, has anyone looked inside? how does it run?
Fourth thing … even though the concept does have potential, the second image is just unbelievable. The only way I can see it used is as a background on the Dr. Wondertainment Sweet Dreams Alarm Killer package.
That said, I do love the idea of this, especially with some of the tidbits you have mounted in (end of public health concern, say.)
Thank for for posting a lot of valid points; I'll definitely edit this tonight or tomorrow.
However, I believe that I did specify that most of the white text requires a microscope; and I did put small white lines on just a few of the hands as a good measure.
And to answer your aside, yes, and no. The third addendum notes that the clock was going to be disassembled, but this plan was postponed.
Everything else you've said I now agree with.