Hey everyone. I have a new draft I'd like some feedback on: http://scpsandbox2.wikidot.com/dmatix-s-sandbox-mk2 under Cathar Journal.
On the one hand, the historical stuff is insanely interesting.
On the other hand, there's not a whole lot to the effect other than a few visions and a list of names.
Also, this would be SCP-XXXX-EX if it's been neutralized.
That's actually something I've been wondering about. It seems some people use -EX only for explained items, rather than those simply destroyed, while others do as you do. As for the item, it's more about the implications of it- the Cathars were right, they were the only one capable of releasing mankind from eternal torment, and the Foundation killed the last of them by accident. Maybe I should get the "Cathar's were right" Stuff more clearly, though I'm not sure how.
If you want to go with the "Cathar's were right" angle perhaps an experiment log showing what were to happen in the Consolamentum was done randomly, i.e. on a person not about to die, and it having some effect on their moral reasoning and judgment? (since Christian teaching dictates that the soul is a seperate and distincint entity from the physical body, and it alone is responsable for moral action) Just a thought.
The problem is, there is no one outside that list of people who knows how to perform it, and them being wiped out is kinda the point of the article. Besides, according to the Cathars, nothing would happen. It's just that the Consolamentum cleans the sins of the soul and can be done only once per lifetime. So, near death makes sense.
I made quite a few changes, and added an additional effect that will hopefully make the point a bit clearer, and more interesting. I'll probably add more tests as well.
I like this (but then again, I like historical SCPs) and don't mind that the effect is subtle.
BTW, this is not an -EX, but a Neutralized SCP. -EX is for when the Foundation has figured out how the SCP works, and it turns out to have been non-anomalous.
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I guess my broader question is this, is the goal to suggest that the Cathars were right, or that this SCP makes you believe the Cathars were right, because the latter impression is that I get from the interview you added. I like it, because I think it speaks to the strength of the piece that I can walk away from it and wonder, but I can see how someone else might not, sorry if that is not the most helpful advice, but it is the best I can offer.
I decided to keep it purposely ambiguous. If the Cathar's were right or not is left to each reader's personal interpetation, and even if they were right, if life is still worth living is another question. The article is posted, by the way, as SCP-1321.