Aside from a length/terminology issue and some minor grammatical issues, this is a fairly solid draft. However, I can't shake the feeling that it's much too similar to the extremely popular SCP-882, which in the end accomplishes the same thing while being much more creepy due to the human factor.
Crap. If you think so. I'll try and cut down the needless detail and see if there's some way to make it a little more distinctive.