i need some scp feedback
i need some scp feedback
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» i need some scp feedback
Summary:
please give me feed back before i post my SCP please note i check the draft as often as i can
For the record, its spelled Infra-red.
Though, author, it's weird that you'd say something more than red "infrared" since it literally meant "below red"
when did i say it was over red
TheFrienderman, not only is your feedback misleading, it's very minimal and not particularly helpful to the author here. If you only comment on one small detail, it may give the author the incorrect impression that everything else in the draft is fine and not in need of fixing. If you're not inclined to write more of a substantial review, please hold off on making the first post so a more experienced reviewer can address the thread first. As staff reviewers prioritize threads with no replies, someone posting a low-content critique actually can make it harder for the author to get a more thorough review.
fixed the problem
awesomeaustin884, instead of posting multiple comments in succession, please edit your previous post using the "edit" function under the "options" tab to the lower right of every comment. That prevents spam buildup, and it's in the rules.
Furthermore, please remember that review staff prioritize threads with no replies, so adding extra comments to your thread will lower its visibility and make it less likely that we'll see it needs a review on the forum listing.
With regards to your draft… I'm sorry, but it's very poorly written. You have a lot of simple writing errors (typos like "waist" instead of "waste", failing to capitalize pretty much everything correctly, etc.), and the core concept is a pretty generic monster sort of thing, which we already see drafts of get deleted from the mainsite almost every day because they're so common and predictable.
What grade are you currently in at school? Most successful SCP authors have at least some college-level writing experience, since clinical tone is typically covered in college. If you haven’t encountered clinical tone or writing analytical essays in school yet, it can be hard to write an article meant to sound like the work of a professional scientist. If you tell us where you are academically, we can recommend some materials you can study up on, such as these college resources for clinical tone:
http://www.aje.com/en/arc/editing-tip-maintaining-formal-tone-scientific-writing/
http://academicguides.waldenu.edu/writingcenter/scholarlyvoice/tone
https://healthcare.utah.edu/brand-and-style-guide/writing-guide.php
sorry but thanks for the feed back though and also its supposed to be a hybrid created by the foundation but i see whats wrong and i'll try my best to fix it (it has human DNA, 096 DNA, and the DNA of other creatures)
sorry but thanks for the feed back though and also its supposed to be a hybrid created by the foundation but i see whats wrong and i'll try my best to fix it
I recommend getting the base idea polished up in the Ideas and Brainstorming forum before you try fixing the draft. Go to that forum, post a quick summary of the concept you want to write up (don't link the draft unless someone asks), and reviewers there can help you make the idea more coherent.
(it has human DNA, 096 DNA, and the DNA of other creatures)
That's not really how DNA works. For example, cats have 90% of homologous genes with humans, 82% homologous genes with dogs, 80% with cows, 79% with chimpanzees, 69% with rats, and 67% with mice. (http://genome.cshlp.org/content/17/11/1675.full) You can't just say it has pieces of human DNA and 096 DNA (assuming that 096 would have DNA to begin with, seeing as its anomalous and all) mushed up together.
If you really want to try including more scientific aspects in your drafts, make sure you research them beforehand so you can portray them correctly. We have plenty of professional scientists in the audience, and they'll definitely be able to spot when science is portrayed incorrectly.
thanks now i fixed the DNA thing and just made it a traditional cross breed hybrid
…that's still not how DNA works.
i changed it from DNA to a crossbreed so now its just a traditional hybrid i hope that's better
Like Zyn said, it's one of many problems. I recommend following her advice and get the base idea polished up in the Ideas and Brainstorming forum before you try fixing the draft.
i changed it from DNA to a crossbreed so now its just a traditional hybrid
Again… that's not really how a hybrid works, especially with something that is apparently a mix of things that are fairly different. Hybrids in general tend to be pretty hard to come by—and even hybrids between closely related often don't live long or are sterile and incapable of reproducing (see: https://www.nature.com/scitable/topicpage/hybrid-incompatibility-and-speciation-820.
If you really want to try to input these sorts of scientific background explanations into your articles, you're going to need to do your own research to ensure you're portraying them correctly. In-universe, these documents are written by professional researchers who know their stuff.
Ummm I didn't say it could breed + I took out 096 and humans in the breeding but if you guys don't like it maybe I should try something other than a hybrid but I still think it would be cool to see a scp made by the foundation
I still think it would be cool to see a scp made by the foundation
We have a lot of those already: http://www.scp-wiki.net/system:page-tags/tag/foundation-made
Maybe take a look at those to see the kind of quality your article will need to hit to be successful? Foundation-made SCP articles can potentially be more difficult to write than regular SCP objects, since you have the additional challenge of making sure the reader believes that the Foundation would have created the anomaly to begin with and isn't too skeptical of the premise.
Oh ummmmmmmmmmmmm… I don't know what to say I feel like I'm ripping off other's scps now I feel bad sorry. Should I still posts it whenever I fix it. Maybe I should just ask for help.
Oh great and someone deleted my page
Please kill me I just wanna die now
i hope that this REPOST of the original draft is better
why is no one responding to me
why is no one responding to me
Wikidot doesn't have a response notification system, so no one knows if their posts have been replied to. Additionally, staff like myself (especially admins) are extremely busy with a lot of other matters on the mainsite, so we don't have the time to regularly follow up on the dozens of threads we reply to on a daily basis.
If you happen to be waiting on a reply from someone for a long time, send them a (polite!) PM reminder about the discussion.
If you're having trouble getting further replies on a thread, you can go to the IRC chatroom and ask people there if they can reply to the forum thread, or message a staff member and ask them if they can direct chat attention to the thread.
For this case though, you should probably get your concept checked in the Ideas and Brainstorming forum before working on the draft. That way you can make sure that your idea is new and not too similar to something else, before you start putting a lot of time into writing up the full page.
Well, for starters, some of the information you state is unneeded. Such as the description of what the tongue is used for. If its not anything out of the ordinary, then you probably don't have to state it.
Before you do anything I'd recommend going to the How To Write An SCP page which can be found here: http://www.scp-wiki.net/how-to-write-an-scp
i got rid of the old article because it was garbage and now im working on a article based off of the moth man hope that's a better idea
now im working on a article based off of the moth man hope that's a better idea
We've already got a mothman SCP on the wiki.
I recommend getting the base idea polished up in the Ideas and Brainstorming forum before you try drafting this.
oh well then im out of ideas right now
Here let me help you. Think of an object. Right? Got the object? Alright, so what action is related to it? You got it? Alright, so change that up. For example, an oven that freezes objects instead of cooking them.
thanks would a monkey that teleport's be pretty cool
wait….. is that already a scp too please tell me its not
For example, an oven that freezes objects instead of cooking them.
This is still the "generic magic object" formula, and is not particularly helpful to the author.
For examples of how to spice up the classic overused "thing that does a thing" SCP formula, I personally recommend reading this page: http://www.scp-wiki.net/things-what-do-a-thing-an-essay-on-things
thanks would a monkey that teleport's be pretty cool
No, since we've already got teleporting stuff and having it just be a monkey seems overly random and not thematically relevant.
thanks for being honest
how about this guy as an scp https://images.vice.com/vice/images/content-images/2015/01/14/have-you-ever-dreamed-of-this-man-111-body-image-1421262577.jpg?resize=660:* he appears in everyone's dreams that would be cool in my mind (never mind its just a hoax)
why are all my ideas horrible
Hey man, you were kinda warned for posting multiple comments. You should tone it down.
Alright, let's get this down. I think you're in serious need of coming up with a list of ideas that you want to use and posting them to Ideas and Brainstorming.
The dream guy? SCP-990 kinda already hit that mark before I think it was even a concept. I won't discredit the idea of taking actual phenomena that have reached public interest and converting it into an SCP though. From my understanding SCP-169 took heavy inspiration from The Bloop. I know it's frustrating and kind of upsetting to not come up with many good or original ideas, but I implore you to take your time. For about 5 years I've held off from posting any SCPS (but I hope to post some soon) and that's because I've never had a great idea on what I've wanted to write.
Inspiration can come from many different things. It's just a matter of what it will be. Dr. Cimmerian's YouTube channel helped me a great deal with understanding what goes and doesnt go for SCPs. I suggest you check him out if you havent already.
I wish you the best of luck on coming up with a creative and interesting SCP idea.
awesomeaustin884, for new SCP concepts, please use the Ideas and Brainstorming forum rather than repeatedly posting in an old unrelated draft thread.
/forum/t-7186151/i-need-some-scp-feedback#post-
page revision: 3, last edited: 22 Sep 2018 03:57
