Ok so I got this idea for a 2000 entry, it made no sense so i threw it in the pick up later box, here's my new draft. Enjoy
Also let me point out i'm not shooting directly at 2000 but in that area if you know what I mean.
SCP-XXXX was permitted to be outside for 5 minutes in a secured area, it proceeded to walk to a door
Why would the Foundation let the robot go? Containment is a prison.
The subject will then proceed to fall over and eventually die
Tone feels very off at that point
It drew a pocket knife from its [DATA EXPUNGED}
Is that really worth expunging?
Forbidden to be outside period
As with every SCP?
The interview is awkward formatted. You might want to italicize certain parts.
As for the concept, I find it to be pretty boring. A robot that talks smack until you die doesn't make me feel anything.
one window for viewing.
Why not use a camera?
You must have level 2 accesses
This seems like a set up for a shitty video game fetch quest. "You must find the macguffin key card to continue!"
The Foundation don't use "You" in the article, unless it's in dialogue, or something specifically related to the SCP.
All personnel entering the room must be told of its tendencies.
Yeah, all other SCPs just have random goons who have no idea what the SCP is.
So it's a robot that insults you until you die. Boring.
Anyway, the robot only insulted the doctor twice over the whole week. That's not really insulting; hell, I think most ordinary people insult more times than that.
Note: Don't double post, just edit your post under "Options".
Only idiots deal in absolutes
Sorry totally missed the you int hat sentace, will imeditley get to work on making this work. Thanks for pointing out my problems, spell check can't do all of it for you.
The question I ask myself after reading this is "WHY?"
It's a robot what kills you so it can use your remains as an energy source to recharge its battery. Why oh why does it go about killing in the least efficient way possible - insulting you to death? Why would anyone ever make a robot that works like that? I mean, all someone has to do is walk away from it and its battery goes uncharged. Also, why doesn't it just cut to the chase and say "you don't look so good" right from the start? Does it really have to make you have a big nose, acne, a hunched back, receding hair, and buck teeth first? Most of all, why does it have to cut its way through the door with a pocket knife of all things?
I haven't read the article, but if I had to answer these questions intelligently (God help me) I'd say that the robot was programmed to be incapable of directly killing a human being while also ironically making human remains the sole power-source for the thing (the creator had a cruel sense of humor). So the robot can only get people to kill themselves/each other to obtain it's required power-source, so it is unashamedly rude and insulting in order to get people to commit suicide (at least I hope that's how you die). The problem with that is that no one would commit suicide where the robot can obtain their remains….
Yeah, I'm not sure how to make this idea work.
I'm just gonna be blunt, this isnt that great of an article. But Mythbusters have proven you CAN infact polish a turd, so there my be hope yet.
The tone is off, it sounds like the author is talking to your, rather than reading.
Why not just say "Access is restricted to level 2 or personnel, or those accompanied by Level 2 personnel." Also, 'accesses' isnt a word. It's just access. Like Elk and Sheep.
But, as said above, its a robot what insults you to death. A low-level reality bending CPU who's battery runs on bones. Thats really the bare bones of it (pun intended). With some work, it would be interesting. But needs much work.
I think the "You must be level 2" thing should be changed to "Personnel must be level 2." About the SCP itself, it seems to be just a more polite version of the "Insult Box," except "A Rude Robot" is an android.
It's not interesting in its current form. There are other problems, but this is the basic issue.