This one is alright, but…it doesn't seem to have enough punch. Maybe some support documents would help. maybe this thing got opened in some town, started to freeze everything up. imagine people trying to understand or deal with what's happening. Just needs a little more flavor here or there, but good work.
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Wow, praise from you means a lot! I added some more mystery, tell me what you think =)
This intrigues me somewhat, but A. it needs to be expanded upon and B. holy shit this needs to be written better.
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Three years old, man. Original author may not be around anymore.
In that case, maybe it could be opened up for public editing?
3 years and only at +6, no crap something needs to be done. i'm all for mediocre items being on the site as they make the good ones seem all that much more interesting….but this one is SO short, and its effects almost entirely unexplored. it's like "oh, this is what it seems to do. ok, we're done here i guess." come on.
I dunno - with the psychos that populate the Foundation you'd think at least ONE of them would have at least tried to remove a match before closing it (for extra credit) lighting one of the matches…
I agree with Bland. Sure, the primary overall effect of the temperature drop and the resulting snowstorm are cool, no doubt. But absolutely no mention of even the possibility of striking one of the matches?! Or if they are even removable from the matchbox?
Maybe it's just me, but my first thought was, "If just opening the thing causes a freak snow-day, what would lighting one of those things do?!"
Actually, I sorta like this one… Not that the writing is amazing, but it's not bad enough for me to think it needs a total overhaul.
Hey, would it be alright if i went through this one and touched it up a bit?
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page revision: 2, last edited: 30 Oct 2017 00:04
