SCP Foundation

Hey, my name's a murder of crimes (AMOC) and I've been a lurker on the SCP site for quite a while.

I've been meaning to write an SCP for a while now, but never really felt the urge until now, when the 2019 Cliche Contest has started.

I've written up a basic draft of the concept I have in mind. It's an SCP based on Romeo and Juliet, Sarkicism and compulsive effects; I tried using a whole bunch of cliches that would probably be off-limits otherwise. I have no idea if this idea/draft is any good or if I've completely misunderstood how to write an SCP. All feedback is appreciated; please let me know what you think and tell me how badly I've missed the mark!

http://scp-sandbox-3.wikidot.com/a-murder-of-crimes

Cliches used:

1) Compulsion effect that makes you do bad things/kills you.
4) A doorway of any shape to a different dimension/timeline/world.
7) An interview in which the anomaly is overly cryptic, followed by the interviewer suffering.
10) D-Class = Disposable Class

Thanks in advance!

number (numeral)

This is something that the site used to do that isn't so common anymore. You can just pick one of the two and it'll be fine.

leather bounds

Leather restraints? As opposed to like, metal?

I get that it's a narrative conceit for the sake of having him do crazy gunfu shit, but you could always structure this in a more plausible way. Obligatory reminder that you are the god of this world and there's any number of alternative measures you could deploy which are more easily surmountable by way of simple, sheer will.

I honestly thought you could cap off the article right after he rips her heart out, speaks in proto-Uralic and gets ventilated. That's a great ending; it cements the idea that in fact this door was never quite as benign, or at least as functional as it seemed (as indicated by the pedophile[?]'s vision.) We delve into (imo) a thoroughly unnecessary backstory involving generic religious cults getting stamped out by the Church, Jack Torrance writing Jack Torrance writing Jack Torrance writing Jack Torrance writing Jack Torrance writing Jack Torrance writing, and then a really interesting final tidbit which I feel could be the sole focus on these notes: that being that the door is an active actor in those who study it as well and leads them into these strange rituals.

That's my primary recommendation: maybe keeping in some of her earlier thoughts going along each test, cutting down on a lot of worldbuilding that seems really forced and ultimately unnecessary, cutting down on the Jack Torrance writing Jack Torrance writing Jack Torrance writing, and leaving in that other capper - if you decide not to end it off just at the last interview, which I honestly think is the best course of action here.