My first submission to the wiki. Please let me know what you think. Unless you vehemently hate it, in which case, shush!
Kendal mint cake isn’t proper cake, like a nice, light coffee and walnut sponge, or a strawberry gateaux; it’s just this weird, crumbly slab of sugar and glucose flavoured with peppermint, and sometimes covered in chocolate to hide it. I don’t like it very much, but I imagine it’s the kind of thing that a knock-off Shoggoth might be into..? Right?
Don’t even get me started on Azathoth and Curlywhirly bars.
Huge thanks to my wonderful reviewers: Kakroom,
Reverend Fox,
RockTeethMothEyes, and
mayoculpa.
Also, thanks to everyone who reviewed my earlier attempts which I decided to shelf for the time being; They gave me a lot of great advice which (hopefully) prevented me making the same mistakes again in this article. Including (but not limited to) Jacob Conwell,
DarkStuff,
Eskobar,
Zyn,
UraniumEmpire,
Roget,
Meserach, and
Rimple!
Image attribution:
“Quiggins-Kendal-mint-cake-factory” by Sladen. Sourced from Wikimedia Commons. This image is in the public domain.
ETA: Thanks to Accelerando for adding the tags, thanks to Shaggydredlocks for sharing the article on the Reddit, and thanks to ashausesall for translating the article into Chinese! That’s wild!