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Starting deletion vote at -26.

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Staff Post - Deletion Vote by CrayneCrayne, 31 Oct 2014 07:32
JamJam66JamJam66 31 Oct 2014 07:16
in discussion Per Page Discussions / Per page discussions » Thread

Well shit.

by JamJam66JamJam66, 31 Oct 2014 07:16

It's not bad but I'm not really feeling it. I'm also unclear on whether it was Josephine or another of her puppets on the attack.
If it's the former it seems quite out of character unless it leads into an all out war on the Foundation.

by RetianRetian, 31 Oct 2014 07:13

9.1 x 10 x 9.1 steal cube.

You meant steel, there are no units, and that isn't a cube.

by JamJam66JamJam66, 31 Oct 2014 07:09
RetianRetian 31 Oct 2014 07:01
in discussion Per Page Discussions / Per page discussions » RE:

Good enough to upvote, much as the whitespace gimmick annoys me.
Nice to finally see an explanation for the codename. This may end up being my favorite canon when I finish.

by RetianRetian, 31 Oct 2014 07:01

Is there ever going to be any more Stuff stuff? I kept getting headaches looking at the green stuff, but I've pushed through it, and I would like to see more. I frickin' love Stuff.

by Agent MacLeodAgent MacLeod, 31 Oct 2014 06:19

It's excellent that you're putting forward effort. However, just because it has a sort-of backstory, it's still a thing-what-kill-you. Here's a very recent example of the sort of scary thing we're looking for. Here's another one; note how this one is immobile and can't even do anything. An SCP doesn't have to be dangerous. It can be perfectly harmless, or even funny. But it does have to be entertaining to survive on this site. I mean, nobody ever says it, but, when you post up an SCP, we're demanding that you create a high-quality piece of literature for our entertainment. Honestly, as a community, everyone would rather have the younger, less-experienced writers just chill than jump the gun and post low-quality content. It's a bit harsh, but it's the truth.

by Agent MacLeodAgent MacLeod, 31 Oct 2014 06:04

It's okay, I'm glad for the constructive criticism. If I were reviewing this article I'd probably find something wrong with it in the first sentence. I would find it great if I could turn this from a pile of junk into a half-decent article.

by SirSpudssSirSpudss, 31 Oct 2014 05:43
JhenJhen 31 Oct 2014 05:40
in discussion Per Page Discussions / Per page discussions » SCP-1884

This is somehow both heartbreaking and heartwarming all at the same time. I love how it kind of hints at the idea that life as a SCiP might not be as bad as life on the outside could be. Or at least that's how I read it. And it's really neat to see the occasional sentient set of entities that are so unfailingly polite to their assigned researchers and the like. I upvoted this a lot. Or would have if you could give more than one. But take my +1. I would like you to have it.

by JhenJhen, 31 Oct 2014 05:40

I edited the page a little, hopefully it's less generic. The new version may have spooked me, but I'm not sure about the rest of you.

by SirSpudssSirSpudss, 31 Oct 2014 05:27

I really like it. But, as is my way, I am left with questions.
For starters, was Dr. R. ever a passenger? If so, that could explain the O5 note. "Nope, we're not looking into this. Nope. How are you feeling, by the way?"

by Doctor GE SmithDoctor GE Smith, 31 Oct 2014 05:12

*Clap clap clap* I would upvote just for the obvious and MASSIVE research you had to perform to write this article. But I will also upvote because it's awesome. It somehow reminds me of the Reapers from Mass Effect.

by SoultearSoultear, 31 Oct 2014 05:06

I hear one ridiculous spook and I decide to shrug it off (after all this is SCP), but then I hear another and my general view of this article begins to diminish.
I am then barraged by more and more and more.

Working with little kids, this trend comes up a lot when they wanna create something like this. They take every idea from a subject and merge it together thinking "cool thing + cool thing + cool thing + cool thing + cool thing = really cool thing," This is not the case.

I would advise stripping this down to one basic idea, and then building around that instead of adding another 20 ideas. I also feel that if this article was written more professionally, and went over the properties more slowly (making this longer), people would take the time to look through all these things your SCP has to offer.

by Professor Will Professor Will , 31 Oct 2014 04:53

I don't like this: the scip itself is bland, poorly written and uninteresting. On top of that I find the descrition of its abilities to be lacking in content, as it is now it could be renamed "Magical Bone Stealing Owl booooh"

Downvoted.

by SoultearSoultear, 31 Oct 2014 04:52

Agreed

by Dr HysteriaDr Hysteria, 31 Oct 2014 04:47

I knew we shouldn't trust teddy bears! I knew it!

Upvoted

by SoultearSoultear, 31 Oct 2014 04:46

So creepy and weird, original too. Things that seem quite hard to find nowadays. Upvoted.

by SoultearSoultear, 31 Oct 2014 04:41

This SCP serves as a chilling reminder that man should never attempt to play God.

-1

by djkaktusdjkaktus, 31 Oct 2014 04:38

This article ceased to interest me, I found it to be generically creepy, and execution needs improvement. Have you tried any of the resources DJ supplied? They're extremely helpful. Here are some specific things I'd personally change in the article as it is right now: (Notice my karma is low so if I say something wrong someone please correct me)

Containment Analysis:
-Are these two armed guards over, or under the 50 meter radius?
-Are he armed guards supposed to combat the SCP in the event of a containment breach? Or keep others out of the radius? If they are meant to combat Bob then how? If they are keeping people out why not just put up a different obstacle like keeping him in a part of a building where no one can get close?
-What is the Foundation's reaction to a breach?
-Are there small objects placed in his cell?

Description Analysis:
-White as in caucasian or do you mean actually white?
-Mechanical in what way?
-If I were in a cell I'd probably look at the cameras too since it seems there's not much to look at. Is he looking at hidden cameras? Is he identifying the personnel watching him?
-"Messily" is probably not the best adjective in a scientific article.
-Subject is used to describe your SCP at least 3 times. This is not the right terminology for subject. This is however, a common mistake. Just note that "SPC" does not equal "Subject"

Lastly: You know exactly what your SCP does and that's great! Unfortunately the idea is somewhat generic. HOWEVER! Any SCP can work through execution. Maybe give the SCP a character that's less rigid to responsive action and/or provide a backstory to it. A well thought-out containment is a definite must. After all, it's the first thing you read, and even the most generic SCP can prosper with a good, interesting containment.

Sorry for calling your article generic. Frankly I think it just needs work.

by Professor Will Professor Will , 31 Oct 2014 04:29

Implication that the researcher faked his own death. The kid did commit suicide.

I will probably try to work in the researcher's faked suicide into my current tale series if possible.

by Researcher DiosResearcher Dios, 31 Oct 2014 04:12
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