I Wish You Were Here
rating: +8+x

The hand prints were on the wall, still. Marks of his history. A him who could have been. Kit paused to press his hand against the evidence of a life, lived.

The teddy bear looked on grimly, from the sofa. Peaches lay next to the toy sunning herself and purring quite happily. It was a nice day.

The Duvet Queen had been gone for some time. In another city, maybe, taking photos of herself. Or else she was in the wood, the taste of leaves searching for herself.

Kit wished he could find himself too. He felt like he had been lost for some time. When Gabriel had left, he had taken more than a bit of Kit’s being with him – heart and soul.

I wish you were here to stop me, dear.

People always did. Stole him little by little until he was bare bones. Despite the sun, Kit felt so cold, which made sense as he was bare and broken bones.

The metal chair from the kitchen was cold too despite the sunlight. Kit smelt a week’s worth of dirty dishes and found himself feeling nothing.

“One more for the road,” he told himself. One cigarette, one shot of vodka, one Valium, one petal of Bloom. He waited for the hit of the Bloom to overcome him and bliss him out. Everything could change with one petal.

Nothing happened.

He was immune. He was numb.

”Loskon is Bloom Broken.”

He had heard it could happen, but never believed the anomalous drug would cause a nothingness, not in him.

The lightbulb above him, in the bathroom, flickered, flickered, flickered. Hurt his eyes before the bulb blew, with a whimper, not a bang. Pitched into almost darkness, it had to remind him…

The dark hospital; the being in the reflections.

Like he had done many times before, Kit stood bare foot on the chair.

Like he had done many times before, Kit reached up to the light fixture.

Like he had never done before, Kit felt the weight of rope in his hands.

Struggled, but succeeded, to tie it on to the fixture, momentarily transfixed by the tiny world inside the busted bulb.

Then, a knot.

Not a knot.

"Tell me - How do you tell the difference between a lifeline and a noose?"

It was all ready. Suddenly, Kit felt overwhelming peace.

And then, in shame, he hung his head.

The End.

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