Item #: SCP-1595-J
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1595-1 and SCP-1595-2 are to be kept in separate standard humanoid containment cells under constant surveillance. Personnel monitoring them must have an ample supply of insulin and a syringe on their person at all times. Additionally, these personnel are advised against eating shortly before and after their shifts. Under no circumstances may SCP-1595-1 and SCP-1595-2 be within eyesight of each other, as a mere wayward glance has been proven lethal. Personnel handling SCP-1595-J must wear ear protection to avoid fatal auditory exposure.
SCP-1595-1 and SCP-1595-2 are permitted to send each other messages, designated SCP-1595-3. However, personnel are to avoid looking at SCP-1595-3 and their contents. SCP-1595-3 will be delivered by hand in envelopes marked [REDACTED] for SCP-1595-1 and SCP-1595-2 to read, followed by SCP-1595-3's incineration, as the sight of large quantities of SCP-1595-3 is hazardous.
In the event of a containment breach by SCP-1595-1 and SCP-1595-2, a recovery team must be sent equipped with [REDACTED] to avoid lethal visual exposure, as SCP-1595-J will most likely be engaging in romantic or sexual activities.
Description: SCP-1595-J is a young couple named R████ and J█████, respectively designated as SCP-1595-1 and SCP-1595-2. Both appear to be Caucasian and in their mid-██s. SCP-1595-1 and SCP-1595-2 are constantly infatuated with each other. Because of this as well as the fact that auditory exposure to both of them together is lethal, Dr. ████ theorized that all they ever talk about is how much they love each other. They are able to draw the loosest associations between anything and their relationship. When together, they are in a constant state of kissing, cuddling, hand-holding, skipping, spinning, hugging, giggling, flirting, dancing, or coitus, sometimes all at once.
Observing SCP-1595-J's public displays of affection triggers a near-spontaneous neurochemical and hormonal imbalance in the observer. Witnessing the pair expressing their feelings for each other leads to a dramatic increase in flow of dopamine throughout the nervous system as well as a sudden total loss of insulin in the bloodstream, resulting in euphoria, cognitive failure, and eventually a comatose state or expiration from severe hyperglycemia.
Discovery: SCP-1595-J was found slow-dancing to their favorite song, ████, in the middle of Club █████████ at approximately 2200 hours, ██/██/████ in ██████████, Arizona. They were surrounded by an estimated [REDACTED] dead clubbers who had witnessed the couple's outward affection for each other. The Foundation was notified immediately after local law enforcement discovered the club full of deceased save for the lone couple who were still dancing.
[overhead light heard flickering]
Dr. █████: How are you feeling today?
SCP-1595-1: Dead inside without my J█████. My heart beats for her like the flicker of that light! It's like the mosquito of passion that buzzes in my ear!
Dr. █████: Kill the lights.
[light switch heard clicking]
SCP-1595-1: How dark the world seems without her now, as though I can see the glow of our hearts no longer.
[Interview ended by Dr. █████, as his blood sugar level had started to spike along with his irritability]
Dr. █████: Where did you come from?
SCP-1595-2: [crying] It's been so long since I've heard from him.
Dr. █████: When did you last receive a letter?
SCP-1595-2: [sob] Two hours ago. He said my kiss was sweeter than agave syrup—
Dr. █████: Oh, no.
SCP-1595-2: and that he'll always be there for me, and that I'm cute, but I told him he's cuter.
[armed personnel fire two tranquillizer darts]
Note: At this point, Dr. █████ was beginning to show signs of sudden severe hyperglycemia, including fatigue, headaches, and blurred vision. 30 units of insulin administered.
SCP-1595-1: Do you believe in true love, doctor? It's like life's opera—
Dr. █████: What's the first thing you remember?
SCP-1595-1: The most beautiful face in the world. I had not lived before I beheld such hotness.
Dr. █████: We need to try something else.
SCP-1595-1: The moment we locked eyes (such deep, rich jewels, those eyes), our destinies revealed themselves to us.
Dr. █████: [unintelligible] … word choice.
SCP-1595-1: Only the cosmic jaws of life could break the link between us.
[SCP-1595-1 heard being taken back to its cell while emergency medical assistance is provided to Dr. █████.] He was later diagnosed with Type-█ diabetes, requiring dialysis.
Dr. █████: J█████, please remove your finger from your nose.
SCP-1595-2: We used to pick each other's noses.
Dr. █████: That's disgusting.
SCP-1595-2: Then we'd wash our hands together, letting our sudsy fingers entwine under the cool running water. Reminds me of the time we floated by a waterfall holding hands like little otters.
Dr. █████: Help!
Note: Dr. █████ has concluded that the visualization of SCP-1595-J's public displays of affection initiates the anomalous effect to a lesser but still significant extent than from observing it firsthand. Requests for additional interviews have been denied, and they will continue to be denied as the interviewer will expire if he has to hear SCP-1595-J talk about each other one more goddamn time. He only has one foot now.