Item #: SCP-1836
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1836 is to be recontained1 within Site-641, which is disguised as an active ecological research station and wildlife preserve at N 74.13- W93.81, encompassing the entirety of the Cunningham Inlet. The research station is to be staffed with a full-time research team and support staff including a classically trained angakkuq2 and a certified cosmetologist3 .
A 50km radius of protected waters is to be maintained around the site. These waters are to be patrolled by armed Foundation assets disguised as research personnel or environmental activist elements. Trespassers are to be interrogated, administered level-C amnestics and released in the nearest settlement.
An access causeway is to be maintained into one of the caves that perforate SCP-1836. Access to the causeway is restricted to the Site Director, on-site shaman and cosmetologist. Additional personnel may be permitted by majority consensus of the personnel with access or by direct request of relevant Level-4 personnel. In the event of hostile SCP-1836 activity the staff shaman and cosmetologist are to enter SCP-1836 using the causeway and enact the Helping Hands Protocol4 In the event of failure Foundation personnel are to fall back and observe SCP-1836 until it enters its inactive state. At which time they are to mobilize MTF-89E "Tomas's Tuggers" to tow SCP-1836 back to Site-641.
Update: The Helping Hands Protocol has been found to have variable effectiveness. To date, the protocol has failed on several occasions to completely quell SCP-1836. Outbursts have occurred causing 3 fatalities, and 12 injuries, necessitating refilling of key staff positions. In order to maintain containment the on-site shaman has been given wide discretion in regard to the appropriate ritualistic tack to take when SCP-1836 becomes hostile5. Additional resources have been made available to facilitate containment6.
Update: Following the incidents of ██-██-████ no birds are to be allowed to enter proximity with SCP-1836 during the Helping Hands protocol. All birds roosting on the gravel bar, on SCP-1836 or within a 30 meter radius are to be chased off or exterminated. Birds exterminated in this way will be handed over to the on-site shaman for appropriate ritualistic disposal.
Description: SCP-1836 is a green, non-tabular, pinnacle iceberg peaking 90m above the surface, approximately 123m in length. It is estimated to weigh between 150,000 and 175,000 metric tons and extends approximately 450 meters below the surface. Submersible surveys of the SCP-1836 have revealed many large tunnels extending into the object. Aside from coloration the object appears to be an ordinary iceberg. Core samples have revealed that the iceberg is composed of ordinary ice. Algae entrapped within the ice give the object its unusual coloration.
SCP-1836-1 is a pod of mammalian organisms of the Order Cetacea that are housed within SCP-1836. The pod is composed of several different species with fluctuating composition and number7 . The cause of these changes in the pod's composition are unknown. To date the pod has included specimens tentatively identified as members of the Basilosauridae, Ambulocetidae, Acrophyseter, and Eurhinodelphinidae. Recently Lipotes vexillifer has been sighted during SCP-1836 activity. The mechanism by which inter-species communication is facilitated between pod members is currently under investigation.
The anomalous properties of the object manifest when marine mammals are hunted at sea or on the shoreline by any people who are not of Aleut, Yukpik or Inupiat ethnicity within a 50 km radius of the object. SCP-1836 will begin to accelerate toward the hunt until the object reaches a speed of 35 knots. At this point the hunted mammal or mammals, now designated SCP-1836-2, will change bearing to head directly toward SCP-1836. If underwater topography makes this impossible, SCP-1836-2 will adopt the most efficient course to bring it within proximity of SCP-1836. If SCP-1836-2 reaches SCP-1836 before being overtaken, SCP-1836-2 will place the object between itself and the hunters.
As SCP-1836 is strictly oceangoing, it can take no further action against land-bound hunters. If the hunter or hunters continue pursuing SCP-1836-2 in an oceangoing vessel, however, SCP-1836 will proceed to ram the hunting vessel until it breaches the hull. It will then extrude part of itself into the hull breach and expand, widening the breach. This process will continue until the vessel becomes structurally unsound or begins to sink, at which point the extension will retract.
If no marine mammals were killed or injured during the hunt, SCP-1836 will dislodge from the vessel at this point and drift away, ceasing activity. If any marine mammals were killed or injured during the hunt, however, SCP-1836 will remain in close proximity to the sinking vessel. When the hunter(s) evacuate the sinking vessel, between five (5) and thirty (30) instances of SCP-1836-1 will emerge from the submerged portions of SCP-1836 and engage the hunter(s), dragging them into the submerged caverns within SCP-1836. The fate of these individuals is a matter of ongoing investigation. Expeditions into SCP-1836 are pending approval.
Update: After a brief expedition into the interior of SCP-1836 a small central chamber was discovered. Within the walls of this chamber is a frozen, well-preserved, corpse of a young woman of Inupiat ethnicity. The corpse had suffered injuries in the past and is missing its hands at the wrist. Only the head of the corpse is exposed to the open air. Due to safety concerns only the on-site shaman and cosmetologist are to have access to this chamber.
Interviewed: Teriaq LeChatelier, on-site shaman
Interviewer: Agent Scout Fullbrush
Foreword: Following hostile activity by SCP-1836 on ██-██-████ Teriaq LeChatelier was called to begin the Helping Hand protocol. After eighty minutes had elapsed SCP-1836 ceased activity and LeChatelier emerged from SCP-1836 with injuries reminiscent of prolonged exposure to the elements and several bite marks consistent with human and dolphin jaw architecture on his extremities. He provided the following debriefing to Agent Fullbrush after receiving medical attention.
Fullbrush: Alright, we're recording.
Fullbrush: Let's begin then. For the record, Agent Fullbrush debriefing Tearock LeChatelier.
LeChatelier: It's Teriaq. We've known each other for a year now…
Fullbrush: I'm sorry.
LeChatelier: [muffled] It's fine just [inaudible]
Fullbrush: Right, can you tell me what happened on ██-██-████?
LeChatelier: What? Yesterday afternoon? Yesterday she just got a little mad at me is all. I'm terrible with a comb and I tugged too hard and she nipped me a bit. It's her way.
Fullbrush: Can you elaborate?
LeChatelier: Sure…Every once and a while the ivory comb gets stuck after I've burned the incense and dabbed her with sacred oil. I don't know how her hair manages to get so entangled since she's usually just sitting there…
Fullbrush: When you say stuck…
LeChatelier: Stuck. Like, when I comb her hair inside that frozen living room of hers sometimes it comes to a knot and it gets caught. Do you comb your own hair, Fullbrush? It works like that. If I tug too hard on my own, that's no big deal, but I tug on her hair and sometimes I get nipped because, let's face it, I don't know what to do with that much hair and she's a sensitive lady.
Fullbrush: How do you normally cope with SCP-1836 when it reacts that way to your ritual?
LeChatelier: Eh, depends on her mood. Sometimes I step back and wait her out. Sometimes I have to sing a little something, burn a different incense, offer a sled dog. Sometimes she just wants me to leave; I think that I'm coming as a man into her house is disconcerting. Usually when you placate her you are supposed to look like a fish or send a fish with the comb in your stead.
Fullbrush: Right, is there anything the Foundation could to to improve your ability to control SCP-1836?
LeChatelier: No. There's nothing you can do to improve "control" but you people just don't like listening to that.
Fullbrush: So then-
LeChatelier: [interrupting] You can help by giving me another pair of hands to help me out, preferably one who knows how to deal with long, lady's, hair. Get me a hairdresser. Oh, and untie my hands with pre-ritual preparations. Not every one of her outbursts is the same. She's got feelings even if she isn't willing to tell you qallunaat because you can't be bothered to learn how.
Fullbrush: So formally you'd like to request an assistant with hair-care experience and greater operational latitude?
LeChatelier: Yes. That sounds about right.
Fullbrush: [pause] I'll get the paperwork. We'll see what happens.