Item #: SCP-2422
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: The four members of SCP-2422 are to be housed together in a modified set of nine standard humanoid containment cells, which are to be made to connect to each other through open doorways. These rooms are to be furnished within reasonable limits to the tastes of the members of SCP-2422 as a simulation of a full-size home and small walled-in backyard, including one approved charcoal grill. All cellular network and internet communications are to be jammed within these nine cells.
SCP-2422-A and -B are to be provided with standard textbooks pre-approved by the Project Director in any available requested school subjects, in order to homeschool SCP-2422-C and -D. SCP-2422-B is, within reason, to be provided with whatever standard food items it requests as it seems to prepare meals for the group. With the authorization of SCP-2422-B, SCP-2422-C may also make requests for certain foods, as it seems to maintain a vegan diet.
All members of SCP-2422 are to be closely monitored through live video feed for any communication with the outside world. If any of them are observed communicating with any entity outside the Foundation, all of them are to be terminated, due to the fact that the entity the members of SCP-2422 refer to as “Wandering Father” may pose a security threat. Prayers to Wandering Father are not to be considered actual communication with this entity.
Description: SCP-2422 is a group of four humanoids (designated SCP-2422-A through -D), who claim to be directly related to each other. All members have thus far been cooperative with Foundation personnel, and have shown a generally amicable demeanor towards all staff they have met. Notably, SCP-2422 voluntarily surrendered themselves to Foundation custody (see Acquisition Log 2422-1).
SCP-2422-A is a balding man around 55 years of age. It identifies itself as the father1 of the "family." SCP-2422-B is a woman in her early forties, and has stated that it is the mother. SCP-2422-C appears to be a teenage girl, and claims to be 16 years of age. It is considered to be the daughter. SCP-2422-D, which is believed to be the son, seems to be a prepubescent boy. It has exhibited behaviors aligning with mild to moderate low-functioning autism spectrum disorder. It is believed to be around 12 years old.
As a whole, SCP-2422 behaves and interacts similarly to an average middle-class suburban family, with typical alternating congenial and tense internal dynamics observed.
The members of SCP-2422 claim to have been manufactured by an entity they call "Wandering Father" (see Acquisition Log 2422-1). X-rays and internal scans have revealed all four possess typical biological human anatomy, with no signs of any kind of "manufacture."
All four members of SCP-2422 have exhibited unique anomalous properties which manifest when human subjects establish direct eye contact. Each member's property is telepathic in nature. None of these properties allow any member of SCP-2422 to affect any human through anomalous means, but only allow them to gain information about the human affected. These properties seem to be involuntary, though the members of SCP-2422 have not shown any distress over them, nor given any indication that they consider the anomalies strange or concerning. Personnel requiring knowledge of the properties exhibited by each member of SCP-2422 should refer to the Property Description below.
All members of SCP-2422 have passed standard initial humanoid psychological examinations, and, with the exception of SCP-2422-D, are considered to be capable of functioning autonomously in society. Routine psychological examinations and observations have shown that SCP-2422-C has developed a mild case of depression (see Interview Log 2422-1).
The extent of the members of SCP-2422's congeniality has been tested, including one trial involving three D-Class personnel insulting all members of SCP-2422 continuously for a period of several hours. All members reacted in an unflinchingly amicable manner, although SCP-2422-C has suggested this may have been feigned (See Interview Log 2422-2).
SCP-2422-A has repeatedly apologized for any burden that SCP-2422 has placed on the Foundation, and has offered to grill hotdogs for the entire staff, should they request them.
Acquisition Log: On ██/█/20██, SCP-2422 approached Site-17 as a group. When the posted guard attempted to deter them, they referred to themselves by their current numerical designation, and asked to be admitted to what they referred to as their "home."
Dr. █████ was notified, and performed an immediate interview and psychological examination on the group. SCP-2422-A claimed the group had been created by a person it called "Wandering Father."4 They claimed to have no malicious intent, but repeatedly stated that they were created to exist within the walls of a Foundation facility, if they were allowed. They expressed a desire not to burden the Foundation, or wear out any welcome they may have had.
During this initial interview, SCP-2422-A gave Dr. █████ a sealed envelope, addressed “to the Lucky Recipient.” The note inside has been designated Document 2422-I.
#22: A Friendly Family
"Congeniality breeds Joy." –The Joyful Text, Recommendation #22
Hello and good day. I have observed that you as a whole are severely lacking in Joyful celebration. Your employees are deathly Serious all the time. I find that very UnFortunate.
I have created this wonderful family for you, modeled after my Joyful Recommendation #22. They should not be anything but Kind and Joyful. They come as a set. Please keep them together, for the sake of my old heart. Theirs, too, actually. If they spend too long apart, they'll go into cardiac arrest. I promise that little kink will be fixed in future creations.
They have been created to find a specific Foundation Site, the one I have judged is the most UnJoyful. Please allow them inside. They will spread Joy, Love and Happiness.
Please treat them well and give them a house-sized space. If you keep them together in one room, they'll probably tear each other apart. It's another one of those bugs I haven't quite been able to work out. I know you can work around it.
I hope this gift will alleviate your UnFortunate UnJoy.
Yours in Joy and Harmony,
Addendum: As of 11/██/20██, all testing performed on SCP-2422-C and -D must be directly supervised by at least one Senior Researcher. Any unauthorized activity by any personnel involved in the testing is grounds for immediate reprimand and punishment.