BRAVADO Drill ██/██/1983:
Na tisícich pleciach stojí
Tisíc mozgov žije ňou
Nadácia - ľudstva žitie
Jej jedinou úlohou
Agent, vojak, vedec v plášti
černokňažník v obleku
Bok po boku svorne stoja
nedajú sa k úteku
Čo by hromy kol' nich bili
Žrať ich zachcel večný plaz
Svojim umom zhatia silu
rozvrátivšiu sveta ráz
Tisíc divov, tisíc zmarov
tisíc hračiek prírody
Každú z nich dnes číslo zdobí
človeku viac neškodí
A ty, bože, že vraj vojny
s ľudským umom chceš sa biť?
Pred tebou už mnohí chceli.
Zostala im holá riť.
It rides on a thousand shoulders
Inhabits a thousand minds
Foundation!- humanity's salvation,
Its sole goal.
Agents, soldiers, white-coated scientists,
Suited workers of miracles,
Side by side they stand united
Firm against the foe.
If thunder struck about them,
Or a lizard bared its teeth,
With their industry they could stop the power
That would unravel the world
A thousand wonders, thousand dooms,
Thousand toys of nature,
Each one now decorated with a number,
Won't harm us anymore
As for you, god, supposedly of war
Do you seek to challenge our genius?
You're not the first to try-
We'll leave you bare-assed!
Item #: SCP-2601
Object Class: Keter Neutralized Pending
Special Containment Procedures: All Containment documents, both hard-copy and electronic, concerning SCP-2601, shall begin with a randomized transcript of or extract from a previous BRAVADO Drill.
SCP-2601 is contained in a standard Reinforced Humanoid Containment Cell on Site-██, fitted with additional radiation shielding, and connected to a soundproofed general-purpose room of a size suitable for BRAVADO Drills. Site-██ personnel are to be selected from as diverse a range of international backgrounds as possible, and personnel from military families or traditions should be prioritized.
SCP-2601's cell is immediately adjacent to an empty standard Reinforced General Containment Cell equipped with additional radiation shielding and fire-suppression equipment capable of withstanding direct exposure to high-explosive detonations. SCP-2601 has been made aware of the existence of this cell, and its utility in containing SCP-2601-1 instances during Myrmidon CLEAR Events. In the event of a Myrmidon UNCLEAR Event, Site-██ will enter full lockdown until security personnel have destroyed or contained all instances of SCP-2601-1. Site-██ itself is fitted with double-thickness radiation shielding in every room to minimize the health risks caused by the destruction of SCP-2601-1.
BRAVADO Drills are to be enacted at least 24 hours before each full and new moon. All Site-██ personnel are encouraged to contribute material to and participate in these drills, to maximize their effect on SCP-2601. The Site armoury is to liaise with international Foundation military archive groups for the purpose of gathering suitable equipment for drills. All BRAVADO Drills must conform to the following points:
- Drill personnel must be wielding and making threatening gestures with a weapon from their ancestral cultural lineage1, developed before the invention of gunpowder.
- Drill personnel must perform in the physical presence of SCP-2601. Given that SCP-2601 has demonstrated some level of omniscience, why this is necessary is unknown.
- Drill personnel must be wearing at least one piece of traditional military dress or equipment from their ancestral cultural lineage, developed before the invention of gunpowder.
- Drill personnel must recite at the very least six lines of original prose speech or poetry in their native language.
- This recitation must insult SCP-2601's military prowess or otherwise praise the military prowess of the Foundation.
- Drill personnel must continue the BRAVADO until SCP-2601 indicates that its strength has been sufficiently restored and returns to its containment cell.
If the BRAVADO Drill is judged to be successful, the next Myrmidon Event shall be classified as CLEAR, and Site personnel can continue operations as normal during the Event. If the Drill is not successful, the Event shall be classified as UNCLEAR and Site security personnel shall prepare to contain and repel SCP-2601-1.
Description: SCP-2601 is an intelligent humanoid mass of antiquated military equipment, which claims to be a prehistoric war deity by the name of "Insaera". SCP-2601's body, which maintains a consistent weight of 346kg, is composed of layers of armour and military panoply, all consistent in both style and date with a wide variety of historical cultures. Should a piece of equipment be removed from SCP-2601's body, it will be immediately replaced by another item; SCP-2601's mass does not change when this occurs. Current components of SCP-2601 include a padded cotton coat of Mesoamerican origin, an early Renaissance-era Italian sallet helm, a genet-tail kilt from south-central Africa, and a pair of proto-Etruscan style armoured gloves composed of an unidentified alloy of aluminium.
SCP-2601 is capable of speech in any language known by the subject to whom it is speaking. SCP-2601 will generally use the subject's first language, and adopt a voice that is the same gender as the subject. Though the entity does not respire, it frequently vocalizes heavy coughing and other sounds consistent with a human suffering from mild pneumonia. SCP-2601 possesses human-level intelligence, though it demonstrates the symptoms of early-stage Alzheimer's Disease. The entity is incapable of walking unassisted, and claims to suffer from severe joint pain when in motion. SCP-2601 has proved to be cooperative with Foundation personnel, and has shown strong regret and remorse for the burden it feels it has imposed on its containment and liaison staff.
At dusk (the exact time varies) on the night of the new and full moons of each month, SCP-2601 will initiate a Myrmidon Event. It claims that it does so unwillingly, and demonstrates signs of severe physical pain during an event, especially those classified UNCLEAR. During a Myrmidon Event, several instances of SCP-2601-1 will appear within approximately 700 meters of SCP-2601, and attempt to attack any living beings nearby which are not the entity itself. The number of SCP-2601-1 manifested varies widely, but is generally higher during UNCLEAR events (5-312, maximum) and lower during CLEAR events (1-4, maximum).
SCP-2601-1 appear as featureless approximations of human beings clad in a variety of military equipment from periods before the large-scale adoption of gunpowder. Each instance of SCP-2601-1 during a single event will bear arms and armour from the same time period and location. SCP-2601-1 have limited intelligence and are incapable of communication, though they do show knowledge of basic small-unit tactics. SCP-2601-1 are capable of feats of unusual strength and agility, but lack the durability needed to survive the strain of such exertions. For example, during one Myrmidon UNCLEAR event on ██/██/193█, SCP-2601-1-498, clad in the garb of an Armorican Gallic warrior, was observed to pull open a hydraulic security door with its bare hands, then expire as both its arms were removed from their sockets by the effort required to do so.
Instances of SCP-2601-1 demonstrate extremely low survivability and expire rapidly and unpredictably when manifesting. The longest SCP-2601-1 has ever remained active was 3 minutes, 19 seconds during an event on ██/██/1948, and instances frequently expire within seconds of their appearance. When an SCP-2601-1 instance expires, either due to instability or physical trauma, it will emit approximately 150J of energy, in the form of a single, uniform, high-intensity burst of gamma radiation. Within 3 seconds of this release of radiation, the instance will explode with an energy of up to 45x 106 J. The destruction of a single SCP-2601-1 instance within a group of several other instances is generally sufficient to trigger a chain reaction, causing intense radiation emissions as the group expires simultaneously.
SCP-2601 is able to exert limited control over the number of SCP-2601-1 appearances and the location in which they manifest, but only when a Myrmidon Event occurs within 24 hours of a successful BRAVADO Drill. SCP-2601 claims that BRAVADO, and the use of aggressive military language in its documentation, gives it some measure of temporary strength or control over its abilities. Since the adoption of excerpts from BRAVADO drills in containment documentation in 1904, the average number of SCP-2601-1 manifestations, even during UNCLEAR events, has consistently decreased by 10%. SCP-2601 has consistently manifested SCP-2601-1 inside pre-designated containment cells and other locales requested by research personnel during Myrmidon CLEAR Events.
Document: Royal Society for the Security, Containment, and Protection of Anomalous Artifacts memo, 4 April 1902:
[…]sudden materialization in an unused containment cell of an entity composed entirely of badly damaged foreign and antique military equipment on the 31st of May. Addressing Site staff in the tones of an elderly gentleman, it introduced itself as 'In-sa-era' and requested that it be contained for the sake of its own health and safety. The creature claims to be a warlike deity of great age which has been alive since 'before [humanity] began'. It has requested that members of the Society Security Bureau address and threaten it in a warlike manner, and that such actions constitute a panacea to the various injuries and ailments of great age. While the veracity of these claims is yet unknown, the creature has proved cooperative otherwise.
Notably, it expressed an awareness of the cessation of hostilities in South Africa, as well as the signing of the Treaty of Vereeniging, several hours before word was received by wire in the United Kingdom. It claimed that this incident was "the final blow", though against what said blow was directed is unclear.
Document: Extract from the personal notes of Junior Researcher N█████ Silongo, ██/██/1945:
I have been speaking more and more with the entity- there is something fascinating about its presence. For all that it is old and doddering, not to mention hopelessly out of touch with the state of the world, it has gravitas. You can feel the weight of history radiating off it. To In-sa-era, all humans are equal. So long as we can fight, there are no differences between us. In light of the events of the past few years, there is a refreshing simplicity to its worldview.
Document: Extract from an interview with SCP-2601, ██/██/1948:
SCP-2601 was interviewed as part of its regularly scheduled social time by Researcher Silongo. During the previous Myrmidion CLEAR Event, the four manifestations of SCP-2601-1 that had appeared demonstrated unusual stability (see above). The following extract has been translated from isiZulu.
Researcher Silongo: SCP-2601, I've been told you've been feeling more energetic of late. How are you?
SCP-2601: Aaaah, yes, yes. Oh, my joints still ache and my nose drips rather than smelling iron on the breeze, but I haven't felt this good in years!
Researcher Silongo: Your last batch of SCP-2601-1 was unusually… stable. You can understand our concerns.
SCP-2601: Yes, yes. You're worried about my little bodyguards. Not to fear, mortal. If my health continues like this, I might be able to actually order them about for once! None of that falling apart. Imagine- real soldiers, at the beck and call of Insaera!
Researcher Silongo: Do you have any conception of why this might be happening?
SCP-2601: Why, isn't it obvious? An iron curtain has descended across Europe! I haven't felt this much posturing and bravado since- since- in a long time! Why, did you know- that, eh..
Researcher Silongo: SCP-2601?
SCP-2601: Lost my damned train of thought. Ah yes. In America, they're actually singing songs wishing Stalin dead! Oh, if only you could understand the warmth I feel.
Researcher Silongo: I'm not entirely sure I understand.
SCP-2601: Oh, but I'm sure you do, Silongo! Two great armies gathered on the field, raising their weapons high and wishing death upon each other! Millions of soldiers, singing their own praises and blessings upon their kingdoms! It's positively medieval. Make no mistake- the Foundation has done a great deal of work towards keeping me hale, but this is something else entirely.
Addendum 26/12/1991: As of 12:00am, SCP-2601 has become totally inactive. Removal of the entity's components decreases its mass as expected. The remains of SCP-2601 have been disassembled, and a human skeleton, similar in form to those recovered from archaeological digs in the Levant and radiocarbon dated to approximately 6000BCE, was extracted from the surrounding armour. After moulds and detailed photographic records of the skeleton were taken, it was cremated and given a full Foundation military burial on the orders of Site Director Silongo. SCP-2601 has been reclassified as Neutralized, and Director Silongo has been reprimanded for destroying a potentially valuable paleontological artefact.
Addendum 12/02/2013: At 2:57am UTC today, a single instance of SCP-2601-1, bearing the uniform of a member of the Korean People's Army and armed with what appeared to be a Type 56 assault rifle, materialized in the main common room of Site-██. The entity saluted and immediately vanished, without the expected radiation emission or explosion. Reactivation of SCP-2601's Keter status is pending.