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Info
SCP-3305: The Father, The Son, And The Holy Toast
When they pass around the crackers during communion, they aren't kidding when they say that's the body of Christ.
This SCP is dedicated to Taylor and Joy, who helped me get this stupid, stupid picture.
Author: Captain Kirby
SCPs
SCP Number Rating SCP-3393 1211 Captain Kirby's Proposal 782 SCP-4514 626 SCP-3448 581 SCP-5552 573 SCP-3844 502 SCP-3388 476 SCP-5003 434 SCP-3866 431 SCP-3305 400 SCP-3449 377 SCP-4877 371 SCP-4321 335 SCP-016-J 266 SCP-7100 256 SCP-3123 232 SCP-3393-EX 217 SPC-1057 216 SCP-3511 206 SCP-6007 194 SCP-3633 190 SCP-4925 186 SCP-4479 179 SCP-3767 168 SCP-4316 161 SCP-4775 141 SCP-4034 135 SCP-5877 106 SCP-5448 99 SCP-3650 99 SCP-3203 66 SCP-5779 62 SCP-3405 52 SCP-3481 47 Tales
GOI Formats
Title Rating Captain Kirby's Proposal, Or Something 186 My Head Is On Fire And I'm (Not) Ok 98 Project Proposals 2004-013/2014-114/2024-072: "Losing Your Cool" 70
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SCP-3250 - Jesus Fried Chicken by minmin and LilyFlower
Public knowledge of the substitution of Kentucky Fried Chicken's secret "Eleven Secret Herbs and Spices" recipe is to be suppressed.
SCP-3166 - You Have No Idea How Alone You Are, Garfield by Tanhony
The exterior layer of SCP-3166's body resembles a crudely-made costume of the character Garfield, which field inspection has shown to be composed of legitimate cat fur. However, analysis of SCP-3166's composition in the field has shown that its interior mass is composed entirely out of pasta: specifically, lasagna.
Item #: SCP-3305
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: MTF Gamma-84 (Holy Toasters) are to be permanently stationed at SCP-3305. All personnel attempting to gain access to SCP-3305 without prior approval are to be detained, administered Class-A amnestics, and released.
Should SCP-3305-1 manifest, it is to be detained by MTF Gamma-84 and transferred to Site-19, where it will be stored in a standard humanoid containment chamber. Protocol Judas is to be executed in the event of a containment breach meeting the required criteria.
Description: SCP-3305 is a collection of five trees in the ██████████ Forest with slices of white bread stapled to them. All attempts to remove the bread from the trees have failed.
If a particular ritual is performed at SCP-3305 (See Document SCP-3305-R), then a humanoid composed of bread will appear (SCP-3305-1). SCP-3305-1 will offer parts of itself to eat, and puncture itself to produce wine to drink. This bread and wine have restorative properties, as individuals who have consumed them report being cured of all physical and mental illnesses.
All individuals who consume part of SCP-3305-1 worship it, as well as bread in general. The form of this worship varies highly between individuals. Similarities between this effect and those observed in SCP-3250 and SCP-2867 are under investigation.
While amnestics can successfully erase memories of interaction with SCP-3305-1, subjects under SCP-3305-1’s effects still believe in the existence of SCP-3305-1, and will continue to worship bread. Only after SCP-3305-1 has been terminated do amnestics become effective at erasing all memories regarding SCP-3305-1.
Additional Documents: