Name: Vladim A. Eisenberg к.т.н.
Security Clearance: Level 2 Temporarily revoked.
Education: Specialist Diploma, Charkov Polytechnic, Candidate of Technical Sciences (к.т.н), Kyjev Polytechnic
Specialisation: Material Science, SCP Research, Containment procedures.
Site of Operations: Site-19. Formerly Site-35.
Profile: Researcher Eisenberg is currently isolated in Section-5 Medical Wing of Site-19 subject to treatment for [REDACTED] (see Document-19-SG31-VAE-1 for assessment records and Document-19-SG31-VAE-2 for prescribed therapy and medication) resulting from SCP-022-J exposure.
During his indisposition, the coordination of any projects under his lead is passed on to the co-ordinator of the Anomalous Structural Materials Research Group. The status of the documentation maintained by Researcher Eisenberg is unclear. Personnel of appropriate clearance willing to re-view and corroborate the content of such files can find them listed below.
History: Born in Mukacevo, Ukrainian SSR. Two siblings - Older David agricultural engineer, currently unemployed, younger Leonid arrested in 199█ for claiming tax returns from fictitious trades. Studied materials science on Charkov Polytechnic.
Joined the Foundation in 1998 as a fresh graduate after being involved in joint research between the Foundation and the Ukrainian government relating to an outbreak of SCP-836. Done his post-gradual studies while working for the Foundation as one of the researchers overseeing production on Site-35.
After the [REDACTED] attack on Site-35, and resulting containment breach Researcher Eisenberg was one of the ██ survivors, found four days later in a janitor's closet in the administrative building, dehydrated, delirious, and hugging a stuffed lynx claiming it to be "Uncle Fedor from Volgograd".
He has since made a full recovery, and been assigned to Site-19, where he was responsible for indexing and coordinating research for objects discovered within Central and Eastern Europe, in addition to working as a part of the Anomalous Structural Materials Research Group.
On ██/07/201█, presumably as an administrative oversight, Researcher Eisenberg was assigned to work on documentation pertaining to SCP-022-J, despite his personnel records indicating him to be of short temper and likely suffering from SCP-022-J-2. Approximately half-way through the task, Researcher Eisenberg entered a rage state, which culminated in him assaulting a security guard with a keyboard. (see Incident-022-J-1 for details). As a result, Researcher Eisenberg was submitted for psychiatric examination, and based on its findings, temporarily relieved from duty.
Notable Possessions: Researcher Eisenberg's office contains "Nastasia", an instance of SCP-692-1 - an ambulatory 0.5m x 0.3m sheet of linen cloth enclosing the shape of a house cat. On ██/08/201█, after numerous requests, SCP-692-1 "Nastasia" has been moved to his current dwelling, after being confirmed as safe for handling. Researcher Eisenberg appears to be progressing towards recovery at a significantly faster rate since.
Researcher Eisenberg has catalogised the following SCP:
- SCP-430 - A Peasant's Punishment
- SCP-692 - Revives the Colours
- SCP-836 - Structural Cancer
- SCP-936 - Fruit of Man
- SCP-1011 - Humanization Process
- SCP-1043 - Instant Structures
- SCP-1103 - Dr. Wondertainment Young Surgeon's Transplant Kit
- SCP-1232 - Novosadov Syndrome
- SCP-1618 - Gilded Urinal
- SCP-1729 - The Collectors
Researcher Eisenberg has aided in the catalogisation of the following SCP:
- SCP-074 - Quantum Woodlouse - (Unknown author, most recently updated by Researcher Voct) Complete documentation overhaul.
- SCP-566 - Word-A-Day - (Originally by Agent "Sensei Le Roof") Complete documentation overhaul.
- SCP-669 - A Didactic Perspective - (Originally by Agent Circeus) Complete documentation overhaul.
- SCP-694 - Pseudoteraphosa habilis - (Originally by Dr. Lothaire B. Dumount) Complete documentation overhaul after suspected SCP-732 outbreak.
- SCP-857 - Human-Based Ecosystem (Catered to while working by Tim "Tanhony" Hyne) - Procured photographic evidence.
- SCP-1308 - Hungarian Floater - (Originally by Agent1 "RandomRedneck") Completized documentation from fragmentary data.
- SCP-1436 - The Saddest Necrophile - In collaboration with Researcher Voct.
- SCP-2102 - Got Shoggoth? - Report authored by MTFO Crayne - Recovered journal data related to object; see Addendum 2102-A-03
- SCP-1150-J - Supervised transcription of document by Researcher Jevgenij Savcenko (said document was found by Agent "theTBAPb" in a dusty pile of paperwork). Found a picture the two overlooked, also in said pile.
- Document 16-E-2813514 - Visual documentation of uncontained anomalous items or phenomena.
- Transcript of level 1 research personnel induction.
- Keeping with the Times
- Guidelines to establishing containment protocols.
- Holder of the Foundation
- BRAVADO Drill ██/██/1983 performed on orders from Researcher Von Pincier.
- GRU-P casefile "FLY AGARIC"
Paperwork in progress.
Participated in Staff Prank War of 2011
Contributed to Agent Drewbear's Technical Words guide.
Maintains the Groups of Interest GRU Division "P" entry.
Maintains the SCP-566 Contents Database
- Hall of Fame
- Straight Flush
- Order of Bright
- Home Run Derby
- International Man of Mystery
- Man of Steel
- David Hasslehoff
- Gallery of Legends
Note: Should I end up incontactable, I refuse any form of staff purview or custody over my works. Standard procedure is to be followed - a rewrite or deletion if something drops below deletion treshhold - otherwise, asides from minor grammar etc. issues, my writing is to be left alone, and no changes are to be made without explicit approval from me.